Negative Role Models

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Go to EffortlessEnglishClub.com. Join my VIP program. Commit to my VIP program today. Go to EffortlessEnglishClub.com. All right, we're back. I missed a couple days, had some busy days, some doctor's appointments, had to go to the hospital.

Nothing serious, just routine appointments for babies. But I'm back. Good to see you. Today, we're going to talk about negative things. Role models, negative role models.

So a role model is not really a hero, but a role model is someone you try to imitate, right? Someone you admire, someone you respect. And traditionally, or usually, when we talk about role models, you're talking about, like in a specific context,

or area. So you might have a health or a fitness role model. or probably more than one. You might have a role model or role models for English learning.

You might have role models for being a good dad or a good mom. You might have role models in many areas of life. And, of course, sometimes we have role models in a lot of areas of life, like your father or your mother might be one of your role models for general, like how to be a good person.

So, role models... Role models are basically people that are doing what you want to do or who are the kind of person you want to be. You want to be like them, maybe in some specific way or maybe in a very general way, but you want to be like them. And so you look at them, you watch them, you learn from them, you try to imitate them perhaps, and you want to be like them.

A negative role model, however, what's a negative role model? A negative role model, so if a normal role model, you want to be like them, right? They're positive. It's a positive role model, a normal role model.

But a negative role model is the opposite. A negative role model, that's somebody who is doing something you don't like. You don't like how they are. You don't like the results they're getting.

So you want to be the opposite of them. We'll talk about that a little more. Let's wait until we have a bigger audience here on YouTube. It's a Saturday in Japan.

Still have some people joining. Recognizing a few of our regular names, Pablo Robles, for example. And Siracha, good to see you as well. Hello to you.

Hello, Pentando. Hello, Scott Anderson. Good to see you. All right, great. So just a couple more minutes while we have a few more people joining and then we'll get started with our topic of negative role models.

Negative role models. We've got people joining from Brazil, of course, here in Asia. It's a good time. It's Saturday in the afternoon here in Asia. All right, guys, let's do it.

Negative role models. Let me explain again a negative role model, a positive role model and a negative role model. Let's just take the area of health. I'll give you an example from my own life.

So in the area of health... It's good to have role models, right? Role models are people who are... They're doing what you want to do. Role is R-O-L-E, right?

Like a role in a play. It means their performance is good. You like their performance. And as I said, you can have a role model in a very specific area of life.

So, for example... One of my health role models, health and fitness role models, is and was Jack LaLanne. Now, he's dead now, but still, he wrote books. You can see some of his videos.

I've got one of his books. And, you know, he lived to be 90, was it 96? I think it was 96. 93, 96. I think 96. 96. And most importantly, he was quite strong, quite healthy during his entire life.

So you can even find a TV interview he did when he was 95, I think it was, 94 or 95 years old. And he's so lively, so energetic, so positive. He acts like someone much, much, much, much younger.

And then, you know, then he had a heart issue. Finally, his heart gave out and he died. But he actually did a workout the day he died. Okay, so we're all going to die.

We're not immortal. But, you know, I think most of us, that's how we would love to live, right? To live strong and healthy our entire life into our 90s. And then right until the day we die, we're doing well.

Or at least fairly well. So he's a positive role model. Now, is he my hero in all areas of life? No. I don't know about his personal life. I don't know about his family life.

I don't know about his religious life. I don't know about these other areas of his life. I don't know about his financial life. Was he good at business?

I don't know. It doesn't matter, right? So he's not a role model for me in those areas. He is very specifically a role model for health. And that was his specialty.

That was, you know, the focus of his work was health and fitness. So he's a very good one to imitate. However, sometimes in life, and this is kind of a good thing to think about, guys. Sometimes in life, negative role models can be very powerful for us.

They can help us a lot, right? Right? And we forget this sometimes. So, like I said, Jack LaLanne and a couple other people have been good role models for me, positive role models for health and fitness.

I try to copy them at least somewhat. But also, I think more powerful for me in the area of fitness... have been negative role models. And this means a negative role model is someone who's a bad example, a really bad example.

I've talked about it many times, how in the United States, it's a health disaster. And more specifically, in my own family, many members of my family, older members of my family, you know, one generation older than me, like my parents' generation, they are...

Terrible, terrible health, terrible health. Most of them are fat. Most of them are fat. In addition to being fat, I watch them, you know, being young, I watch them lose their energy, lose their fitness, lose a lot of their health.

I could see how they were aging very badly. I could see already by the age of 40 for them. So when I was, let's say I was 20, and I could see they were 40, 45 years old, these family members. And they were all fat at that age.

And all of them complaining about being tired all the time and already starting to have some health problems. And they became negative role models for me. I said, I don't want to be that way. I don't want to become like them.

I do not want to become fat when I'm 40 or 50. I don't want to become tired all the time and weak and have a bad quality of life already by age 40, 45, 50.

And, of course, I can still look at them, and now they're in their 60s, their 70s, and it's much, much, much, much worse. It's horrible, right? It's the opposite extreme from Jack LaLanne. And Jack LaLanne, in his 60s, his 70s, he was doing all kinds of crazy stuff, running and swimming across the...

the Bay, the San Francisco Bay, and doing pull-ups and push-ups and all kinds of very extreme things at that age, even into his 80s. But on the other side, as negative role models, these family members, I can look at them and say, not, no, I don't want to become like this. And the thing is that sometimes these negative role models can be very motivating. It's very motivating to me because I can learn from their mistakes.

I see the pain. I see the mistakes. I see the horrible results. I see how their quality of life is so much lower than necessary. And I say, no, no, no, no.

And it gives me a very, very, very strong motivation to be different. And this has motivated me, for example, to never get fat, to never get fat. I sometimes joke if I gain, you know, five kilos that I'm getting fat, right? But I'm not really getting fat.

It's just my limit is quite low. If I gain five kilos, then I feel fat and I will immediately start to fast or do something to stop it and to go back down again.

But they are truly fat. Some of them are obese, super fat. And the other problem is they're not physically active. They just drive around in their cars all day.

And they sit on their butt and watch TV. They walk maybe from the car to the grocery store back to the car. Basically, no physical activity. Very, very little.

And they're very miserable, very miserable because of this. It really begins to hurt your quality of life as you get older if you live that way. And so I've learned, I have learned from their mistakes. So I walk a minimum one hour a day.

Usually I try to do at least two hours a day. That's like the very, very minimum for me for physical activity. And I've started doing this this week. I started doing high intensity training.

I mentioned before. So sprinting once a week. I'm doing sprints once a week. Very good for your body also. As long as you don't do it too much. And, you know, some basic pull-ups and push-ups.

I'm not trying to body build. I just want to keep myself active. But I'm 51, and I'm in much, much, much, much, much better shape than my relatives were at this same age. I'm still very active.

I still feel good. Maybe not as good as Jack LaLanne, okay? I'm probably in the middle, maybe closer to Jack LaLanne, but still of good quality of life. And I plan to continue doing that.

So here's the point. Sometimes we get upset. Sometimes we get upset. Maybe in some area of life we don't have a good positive role model. Sometimes in some area of life we don't have a good mentor to guide us, to teach us.

And we complain about this, but sometimes we can look around and we can find negative role models instead. So, for example, let's say you grew up and your parents, let's say your mom was terrible.

Hopefully not, but some people have this. Some people have bad parents or one bad parent. But let's imagine you grew up and you had a terrible mom. Well, you can use this fact in two different ways.

Some people decide to be a victim. I had a bad mom. And then they become parents, and then they also become a bad parent, a bad mom or a bad father. And they blame their own, right?

Well, my dad, I mean, my mom was bad, so of course I'm also a bad mom. Because... I'm just like her. Of course, how can I be different? That's a victim mentality.

It's a weak mentality. But other people will use that same fact, I had a bad mom, to become super parents, wonderful parents. They say, my mom was bad. I will not be like her.

I will be very different. When I become a mom, I'm going to be great. I'm going to be much better than her. My children will have a fantastic mom or a fantastic father.

They use the negative role model as strong motivation to be much, much better, to do the opposite. So negative role models can be very helpful because what are we doing with the negative role model? You are learning from someone else's mistakes. This is great in life.

It's an intelligent thing to do. Learn from their mistakes. They get the pain. You can avoid all that pain. You can look at them. You can see their actions, their beliefs.

You see the bad results they get. And you learn. You don't have to have the pain. You can just avoid it by learning from these negative role models, right?

It's the same with money. The same with money. You can look around. You can, you know, I've got at least, what, one, I've got a couple friends who are terrible with money.

Well, I can learn from them. Don't do what they do. They get money, they spend it. If they get $1,000, they will spend $1,000. If they get $10,000, they'll spend $10,000.

If they get $100,000, they will spend $100,000. If you give them a million dollars, they will spend a million dollars. They spend the same or more that they get, always.

And that's terrible. And I can look at them and their bad example and realize I can see the bad results they get. They're always stressed about money. They always have money problems.

And I can learn from them and say, ah, well, I don't want to be stressed about money like them. I don't want to. So what are they doing wrong? And I can see their mistakes, learn from their mistakes and do something different.

And then I avoid the pain. I get better results. I don't have to learn from all the pain. I don't have to make all those mistakes myself. Right? It's a faster way to get more success and to avoid a lot of problems in life.

And so I encourage you to look around. Of course, naturally, we look around and we find people we admire, that we respect. But instead of just complaining about people in your life, instead of complaining about them and the stupid stuff they do, the bad things they do, use them.

Use them as motivation. Use them as negative role models. As I said, like my own family. I love them, but I use them as negative role models all the time.

Anytime if I start to gain a little weight, I just look at them and say, I do not want to become like them. In fact, I say I will not. It's a very strong decision.

I will not become like them. I know the result. I know what happens if you become lazy. I know what happens if you don't exercise and stop moving. I know what happens if you become fat.

I can see it in many different people in my life. And it's a terrible, terrible thing. I will not do it. Right? So do this yourself. Look around. Your own life.

It might be family. It might be friends. It might be just people you know. It might be people you work with. And notice the people who annoy you. Notice the people who frustrate you.

Notice the people who are... doing all the things you don't want to do. Notice the people who you don't want to be like and actually study them a little bit. Study them a little bit and try to figure out what are their mistakes.

What mistakes are they making? So you can avoid those mistakes. And you can ask yourself, well, what can I do differently from them? How can I be different from them?

You can learn a lot in life from these negative role models. Again, the victim mentality is to complain about them all the time, but it's more powerful to learn from them.

And even me, you know, when I do this show sometimes, sometimes I'll, sometimes I share my success stories and I share successful ideas that I, or strategies that I have used to get some success. That's a positive role model. And sometimes I will share my mistakes, right? Sometimes you can learn from my negative example.

I would say, for example, with children, have children younger. My wife and I are very blessed that we have two children at a very late age, but I don't recommend doing that because you might not be lucky. You might not be lucky like we were.

So start younger. Start younger. All right, one second. Okay, uh... Let's get into the comments and questions. Before we get into the comments and questions, let me just talk about some guidelines, Guy.

You know our code, right? We do the best we can. We do the right thing. We show each other we care. But a little bit more specific, let me talk about our comments.

Just some general ideas. First of all, don't just keep copying and pasting the same comment again and again and again. This kind of spamming the comments is disturbing.

Everybody wants to make a comment or ask a question. A lot of people do. So you're just filling it up. So don't do that. Just put your comment or your question one time.

I might ignore it. I might not. But everybody gets a chance. Number two, with comments and questions when we're doing live, I will usually focus on comments and questions that are connected to the topic, that are about the topic.

You'll notice that I... There's some names when I'm doing the live show. Some names that I... will read their comment again and again and again. A lot of the regular people, like Siracha, for example, Ibrahim Ali, Liza, right?

And some people complain, well, you always read their comments. You read their comments. Sometimes in this show, you'll read the same person's comments. Two different comments, three different questions, something like that.

Why? Because they are focused on the topic. Because their comments are useful or their questions are useful and are connected to the topic. Whereas other people will come in, if I'm talking about money, they ask me about vocabulary learning.

I understand you want to hear about vocabulary learning, but we're talking about money, so I'm going to read comments that talk about money. I'm going to read questions that are about money and business, because that's the topic for the day. I do other shows about learning English.

If you... These questions are always the same about learning vocabulary, pronunciation. Just watch some of my old shows, guys. Get on YouTube or my blog.

You can find topics about all of these things, vocabulary learning and... pronunciation and fluency and reading. And of course, in the future, I will do more shows about those topics. If I do a show about vocabulary, then I will read comments and questions that are about vocabulary.

If I'm talking about vocabulary, if you ask me about money, I'll probably ignore the comment because the topic's not money, right? So just we're trying to have a discussion. The reason I read the same comments is

or the comments and questions from the same people again and again is because they provide the most useful comments and questions because they're focused on the topic. They're listening to the topic, they're thinking about the topic, and they are adding good information, sharing good stories, or asking useful questions.

So, I'm not trying to ignore you guys or anything, but those are kind of the guidelines for the live show. If you really, really, really, if you have a, finally, one other thing. If you have a customer service question, oh, my credit card's not working, what do I do?

Live show is not a good time for that, okay? Because that's just your individual question. So what you need to do is go to our website, effortlessenglishclub.com. There's a contact.

You can click contact on the menu. Just send us an email and peter.com. He's the person who will help you. He'll help you. Just give him some time. We're a small company, just one person helping with the emails.

He probably needs two or three days sometimes. So just be patient, but he will solve your problem. He'll help you. Okay, so that's it. Those are the guidelines for our live show.

Okay. Yeah, Scott Anderson says, after I stopped working on the tools, I put on weight from being inactive and also hitting 50. No matter how much fasting or walking, I still put on weight. I need to go back to hard physical work.

Fast more. Fast more is my advice to you. You fast enough, you will lose weight. I guarantee it. I'm 51. And in one month, I dropped 22 pounds from fasting and I have not put it back on.

So, but, you know, I did, I did a, well, I did about five weeks and I did, I ate every two days. Mostly it was 48 hour fasts I did. Watch the snake diet videos. It works.

It's great. And then what I do, here's, and then what you do is, so first you maybe do some aggressive fasting, two day or three day fasts, right? So 48 hours to 72 hours, not just one, but again and again and again and again and again, right? You eat, you eat once every two days.

or you eat once every three days. This is for weight loss. If you're trying to lose weight, when you eat that meal, it needs to be basically zero carbs, no carbs, right?

Meat, vegetables, even avoid fruit, avoid any kind of carbohydrate, rice, bread, all that kind of stuff. Nothing with sugar. And you do that eating every two or three days until you lose all the weight you want to lose. So you can do that for months if you need to.

You can do it as a lifestyle. You can just eat every two days for the rest of your life if you want to. But anyway, you'll drop down to whatever weight you need to be at.

And then what you do is every morning weigh yourself. Every morning when you first wake up, Get on the scale and weigh yourself and have your target weight, you know, kind of a line. And whenever you go above that, any day you go above that, you fast that day or you fast for two days.

So let's say like, so I'm doing kilograms because I'm in Japan right now. So our scale has kilograms. So mine is 71. I've gone above 71. What do I need to do?

Boom. Start doing two day fast until I drop down to 71 again. That's it. So you never let yourself start going back up again. As soon as you start going back up fast again, it becomes part of your life.

If you also add physical work, which Scott Anderson is right about this, physical work, it's not just for weight that physical work is important. I think even more important being physical, right? Walking or running and lifting heavy things and doing that. It becomes very important as you get older because otherwise you become weak.

I see this in my family members who are older than me, even some that are my same age. that they have trouble just doing normal life stuff, right? Their energy level's low because they're so inactive, not active.

So it's good. It helps with weight loss, but I think fasting is number one for weight loss. Just don't eat. It's simple and it works. But for your overall quality of life, you've got to move your body.

You've got to do things. You've got to challenge your body a little bit. Thank you, Scott. Yeah, like John Naina says, the power of our mind is huge. We can use it to do good things and set us free from our bad behaviors that lead us down.

Yeah, that's right. It's so much about our mindset and our focus. How we focus our mind has such a strong effect on the results we get eventually. Yeah, and Dan Houghton says, I used to have a boss I didn't like.

Sometimes I remind myself, don't be like him. He's one of my negative role models. Exactly right. Don't be like him. That's exactly right. That's exactly what I think in my own mind when I'm thinking about my family members, about health.

Don't be like them. I start gaining a little weight. I imagine them having a hard time walking around big and fat. Don't be like them. Don't become like them.

It's a little bit of fear, maybe, but fear can be motivating if we use it correctly. If you become a manager or a boss, you can imagine your bad bosses from the past. Don't be like them.

So sometimes those painful experiences can help us. Yeah, Scott, try it. Try the fasting. Just check out Snake Diet YouTube, Scott, because he's really the expert.

He's got many different ways you can do it, but I promise you it works. It works. And if you add in, even just walking, if you walk when you're fasting, so you're fasting, let's say, every two days, you're eating once every two days, and then during those two days, you're also walking an hour or more, it'll speed it up.

Okay, Dudu Scorpion. Hey, good to see you again. Role models who show us what is bad or self-destructive could be useful to learn from. Unfortunately, some people present themselves as good role models and they aren't.

Well, it doesn't matter what people present themselves. You know, you choose role models. They don't choose you. You decide. Right? So, you observe the results they're getting.

That's how you decide is the results, right? Know them by their fruits. I think that's, you know... Another way to say it, but if you, you know, so for money, you know, look for somebody who's making lots of money.

In business, look for someone who's in a similar business that's doing well. Then they can become a positive role model. Or someone who's in a similar business who's not doing well, they're a negative.

Abdallah says, I'm a slim person. So, it's kind of connected to our topic of health here. Do you advise me to go to the gym or swimming? Do both. Why not?

You can do both. I think it's good to... There are different kinds of fitness. There's endurance and general energy. That's like swimming, walking... slow jogging, I call it slow burn kind of activity.

We need a lot of that. We're made for that. But then also, we want some strength, right? Those activities don't build much strength. So I think that we also need to do some kind of activity that's going to build some strength, which would be lifting weights, or I prefer just body weight, like push-ups and pull-ups and things like that.

But just something to build or keep your muscular strength. And then also just something for energy, which is kind of a slow burn. Okay. Yeah, now, see, this is a good point about the false role models.

Young people have a problem finding role models. Some take negative role models as if they were positive because of the media and propaganda. Pablo's right about that. The media, don't get your, get your role models, choose your role models.

The best ones are real life people you know. That's negative or positive because they're real, right? Like I can look, these are for health. I can look at my family.

I know. I know them. I see them. So, they're real. With the media, you have to be much more careful because exactly, you know, there's a brave new world out there and they will try to show negative things as positive.

They'll try to use your emotions against you. So, like, that's why I never have an actor as a role model. They're professional liars. professional pretenders, you can't trust them.

So don't use an actor as a role model. Never, never, never. You know, even someone like Jack Delaney, you know, he's, I think writers can be better. But, you know, he was a media person, but I could, you could see, he's 96, he's jumping around, he's active, his mind is working well.

Yeah, it's very obvious that he was getting great results. But yes, be careful about anyone the media is pushing. Slavica is negative role models. Negative role models.

Let's see. I know if you think about something negative, it will come in your life. Can't using negative role models have an opposite effect and bring something bad in your life? I don't think so.

You're not trying to copy them. You're using them. Now, ideally, you also want a positive, right? It's not enough just to only have negative, right? Because we want to move towards something positive also.

But that, you know, Michael Jordan, the greatest basketball player perhaps ever, He used the kind of anger of criticism, for example, and the possibility of failure as a strong motivation for him. So, you can use these things, but you just use them skillfully.

For example, using myself again as an example. I don't only think about my relatives and... how unhealthy they are. I also had positive role models like Jack LaLanne, Paul Bragg, and some others.

So I could also see the positive side. So ideally you want both. Ideally, both. The negative role models help you to avoid mistakes. And it's kind of a pain motivation.

I don't want to be like them. And then the positive role models, it's more of a pleasure or a positive motivation, right? I want to be like them. I want to get the benefits that they are getting.

We can use both. Yeah, Lisa says, many children are not raised consciously. They can therefore be influenced in a negative way. That often starts at the school.

Yeah, with kids, you know, teach them about this. You can do this with your own kids. You can point out, you can actually show them both negative and positive role models.

people in your family, friends or people they know, people in their life. If someone you think is a bad role model, they're not good, you can teach your children why. Say, you know, look,

This person, they're not good, and this is why, right? Maybe it's just health, again. I may do that with my children. I might say, look at these people in our family.

We love them. They're nice, but can you see how they're suffering because of bad health? Can you see how they suffer, and they struggle, and they have a hard time in life because they're fat, and they're...

in bad health, bad fitness. We don't want to be like that. You don't want to become like that. Why are they that way? I can explain this to children. You can ask them, why are they that way?

Why are they so fat? Why are they so unhealthy? Why do they have all this pain? Why do they have so much trouble in life? And then you can talk about food and food choices.

Well, they eat this. Watch how they eat. They're eating too much food. They're eating too much carbs and sugary food. They don't see they're not exercising.

So we don't want to be like that. We want to be positive. And then you teach them the good things to do. So you can help them do this with kids. You can do this yourself in different parts of life.

You can point out show them negative and positive role models and explain to them why and help them, depending on their age, of course. As they get older, they can think about it more themselves.

Yeah, like Wenang says, sometimes negatives can motivate us to stay away from it. Yeah, pain and fear can be strong motivations, actually, if we use them wisely and correctly.

And then the other side of it then, like education says, wake up every morning with a thought that something wonderful is about to happen. Right, so we can also, of course, then, again, you want something to move away from, that's a strong motivation, and then something to move towards, something, the positive example. And really both, if you combine both of those, will help your motivation quite a lot.

Is it AJ or Ajay? I always wonder. That's an Indian name. Some people try their best to gain weight, but they end up at the same level. What should they do?

Well, you know, I'm not a health fitness expert, guys, so I can only give you my opinion. Eat more food. I mean, that's really it, right? If you're trying to gain weight and you're not, if you're eating and you're not gaining weight, then you're not eating enough calories.

So, eat more. If you're specifically trying to gain muscle, probably need to eat more protein. But I'm not a bodybuilder, so, you know, there are lots of people out there, lots of forums and websites on this topic if you're trying to gain muscle.

Many, many different ideas about how to do it and lots of people. So, It's a topic beyond me. I'm obviously not a bodybuilder, so I can't really answer that question.

But in terms of just gaining... I mean, I think most people don't want to gain fat, right? Nobody wants to gain fat unless you're seriously sick. But for most people who are not sick or fairly healthy, when people say they want to gain weight, it's usually men.

And it's usually they want to gain muscle. is what they really want to gain. So that you have to be careful. It's easy to gain weight, just eat a bunch of garbage, eat sugar and tons and tons and tons of sugary stuff.

You'll get fat, but that's not a good thing, right? You probably want to gain muscle. That means you're going to have to do some hard training and you're going to have to eat a lot of protein and anyway, it gets complicated. So you're going to have to find someone else for that advice.

Isabel has a six-year-old with an attitude problem. She says, I have a six-year-old daughter. I always speak positively to her, but she still says, it's the worst day ever when she's bored and I don't do what she wants. What can I do to become a good role model for her?

Just stay cheerful yourself. Don't get a reaction. She's trying to get a reaction from you, right? They're good little manipulators, these little guys.

So if she's his worst day ever, just ignore it. That's what I would do. And if she's, you know, she won't, you say no and she gets a bad attitude, oh well.

The key thing is you stay calm. There's a great book called Tools for Teachers. It's also great for parents. Tools for Teachers. And a lot of it is about just staying calm as you discipline your children or as you respond to your children.

To not become emotional. in a negative way, meaning don't become angry, don't become upset. So if a kid's like, that's terrible, they're going to do this stuff.

I'm bored. And you just kind of... If they don't get any reaction from you, many times they'll eventually stop because they're not getting what they want.

G90 says, how can we teach kids not to have so many influences in the media like superheroes? Turn it all off. Don't show that stuff to them. Get rid of your TV.

Throw it away. That would be my advice. Throw away the TV. If you have to, you know, if you have a computer, you can get programs so you close down the computer.

You have a password or whatever. They can't use the computer. No screens for the kids. Make them read books. Oh, interesting. Wow, you've got a nice broad range here.

Nora says, I have one daughter, 17 years old, and the other is 18 months. That's a big age difference. I'm thinking of trying homeschooling with the younger one. Yay, that's a cute picture.

Nice. Yeah, great. Good for you. Well, your little daughter's about just a little older than my kids, so... You can keep watching my show because I will talk about homeschooling as I do it with my own kids.

I'll share what I'm doing with you all. Maybe you can learn from my experiences. Very cute. Very cute, though. Sweet. Yeah, well, Pablo's right. Some people, because of their personalities, get motivated if they're told you can't do something.

Yeah, that's right. You have to figure out, like this is part of that know yourself idea, right? Which is so important in life. And that we're all motivated in different ways.

I mean, basically, of course, we're all motivated to get something good. pleasant and to avoid painful bad things. But more specifically, there are different things that motivate people. Some people are motivated more by fear of failure or by criticism or by competition.

So again, using that Michael Jordan example, competition, very, very competitive. The idea of winning, of going against someone else and beating them, super motivating for him.

Other people, they're not so competitive. That competition just does not interest them very much. They don't get motivated by that. They have other things that motivate them.

So you have to figure it out for yourself. What motivates you? You've got to find out. And maybe some people, in some situations, negative examples, negative role models are more motivating for some people.

Right? Avoiding being fat. It's a very strong one for me because I saw so much pain in the life of my family members. So, in the area of fitness, that negative example, the negative role model, it is very motivating for me.

Probably more motivating even than becoming, you know, than like Jack LaLanne. Jack LaLanne is motivating to me, but... seeing the bad example is even more motivating. So you have to figure out, and in other areas, you may be more positive role models.

So you just got to figure out for yourself what is the strongest motivator for you. It's different for different people. Yeah, exactly what Wenong says,

Unfortunately, some people don't learn from the negative role models in their lives. They always make excuses about what their parents did or family members.

However, they should have learned from them. Yes, you'll see this again and again and again. That's a perfect example, people who have bad parents. Again, it's the choice.

Are you a victim or do you learn from it and become different? We know from many, many examples. You can see it in your own life. You can see it also in famous people.

We're in the same situation. The parents are bad. It may be some terrible situation like abuse. Abusive parents. And some people... Or alcoholic parents.

That's an even better example. Alcoholic parents. Let's say you have an... Growing up and one or both parents are alcoholics, right? Drinking alcohol.

They're alcoholics and they're terrible. And then the kids grow up and they become adults. You can see it in the same family sometimes. Brothers and sisters.

And one of them will also become an alcoholic. And what will they say? They will blame their parents. Well, of course I'm an alcoholic because mom and dad were alcoholics.

So that's why I am also. Right? Victim mentality. They blame their parents. But then a brother or sister, another brother or sister, same exact family, they will not become an alcoholic.

They won't even drink. And they will use the same excuse. Why don't you drink? Well, of course, because my parents were alcoholics. They were so terrible.

They were a negative role model. So I will never drink. I will never be like them. Same exact family. And two different choices, right? One chose to be a victim and to copy the bad example, to copy the bad role models.

The other... chose to learn from the mistakes and to do the opposite. Of course, the second choice is the smarter choice, the better choice. Yeah, like, you know, Scott Anderson's right that as Parents Week, of course, we want to be the positive role models.

That's what a good parent does. He says, as a parent, I try to be a positive role model for my two sons. They're adults themselves now. I hope they will try to be positive role models.

Also, we shall see. Yep, yep, exactly. We do our best. All right, about time for me to go. I've got two babies to take care of. Going for a walk. See, this is my training now.

So again, connected to the topic of health. I have two twin babies, as you know. And again, no excuses. No excuses. Some people, you'll see this also.

Some people will use, I've seen it in my own family. Especially women tend to do this a lot. They'll use children as an excuse. I don't have time to exercise because I have children.

Well, I have twin babies, so what do I do? I use them in my training. They help me train. I carry them both. Kind of heavy now. Let's see, 14, 15, 20.

I'm probably carrying now including the carriers, the backpack, plus the baby's weight, I'm doing about 20, 22 kilos that I'm carrying while I walk. That's called rucking or hiking, right? But it makes the walking more difficult.

It gives me a better workout. So I get time with my babies. Outdoors is nice. They like it. They like looking around when I walk around. And I still get exercise, and I'm still spending time with my babies.

So no excuse, right? No excuse, right? Yeah, like, okay. So here's another negative example. Jim Carlo says, Hi, AJ. I see so many fat parents that think their kids should be fat too.

That's sad, right? They post pictures of the kids on social media eating lots of junk food and say it's cute. It drives me crazy. I don't get it. And I don't get it either because it's like these parents are...

They don't want to be honest about themselves being fat. It's kind of sick, right? It's kind of disgusting. It's really sad if they're doing that stuff.

It's hard for a little child to resist that at that age. You just hope later that the child will maybe realize what happened and use it as a strong motivation.

But yeah, I know. It's terrible. It's terrible. And I will say that if one of my parents was fat, but I never became fat. I was not as a kid. I was a skinny little kid.

Thank Manoj. Manoj says, AJ, you're my role model. Good morning. The problems of life make us inspired to do something. Indeed. Thank you very much. Yeah, and see, this is an example, this is again where role models, like Salvika says, parents often tell children not to watch TV, not to use the cell phone, mobile, but they do it themselves.

It's a bad role model for the children. One thing is said, the opposite is done, children are confused. Indeed, now in the case of parents, if we want to be good parents, obviously, yeah, they watch you, right? I realize this myself.

I'm trying to change a few of my bad habits. Luckily, my kids are babies right now, so I have a little time, I hope. But there are a couple of bad habits I have that I'm trying to change so that they don't copy them.

But overall, right. If you don't want them to watch movies and TV, that's why I say throw away the TV. Just take it out of your house completely. Because if you have it in the house and you're watching it, well, then they're just going to complain the whole time.

Oh, you watch it. You kind of understand why they would say that. So if you really want to avoid all that garbage media, you have to get rid of it yourself.

Then it's not in the house. Nobody's doing it. Okay, and then the final point. Oh, uh, I can't, okay, I can't remember how to pronounce this name. It's in Old English.

Leorninde, is it Leorninde? Leorninde Old English. Anyway, I want to interview him. Um, he has a channel. I'm just going to call you Leonard right now.

I'll get the correct pronunciation of your old English name. But anyway, he's got a very interesting YouTube channel that is about learning old English. So, it's language learning, but an old language.

And it reminds me of, I saw a speech by Alexander Arguelles, the guy, you know, the The guy, one of these guys who speaks, I can't remember, 20, 25, some huge number of languages. He's quite famous. He's the guy who invented or at least popularized the shadowing technique.

He really likes the shadowing technique, this guy. Dr. Alexander Argelis speaks and knows a lot of languages. And he gave a very interesting speech I saw on YouTube one time where he talked about, okay, you know, choosing different languages, what languages to learn.

And he said that, you know, people think about which area of the world. Maybe I'll learn European languages, or maybe I'll learn Asian languages. But he had an interesting recommendation that, he says, people forget about time. In other words, choosing languages from the past, right?

That people forget that it's not only modern languages we can learn, but if you really like language learning, why not... Think about learning an old language.

Latin would probably be the most common or one that people think about. Or ancient Greek, Old English. And the reason why would you do such a thing? Well, because by doing that, it opens up, of course, learning all about that, the culture and the history.

Sanskrit would be another one. that you could learn. So, for example, in Old English, you could read some of these great stories in Old English. I think, is it Beowulf?

Is that Old English? I can't remember. Maybe. Or Middle English. But anyway, I want to do an interview about that and talk about this idea. with Leonard, about this idea of learning an old language, you know, a language that's not modern, that's not spoken now, but, you know, what are the benefits and what are the reasons for doing that?

You might be interested, you know, and to think, again, examples of this would be Sanskrit and Latin and Old English, etc. So, anyway, I'll have you on the channel soon.

I've just been crazy busy with my babies. Hey, Vladislav, you're coming in right at the end, unfortunately. Beowulf is Old English, thank you. Yes, Leonard says, Learnende, is it Learnende?

I don't know how to pronounce Old English, so... But anyway, yeah, Beowulf. I think I read Beowulf. Old English, you can... If you know English, you can kind of, with some concentration, I remember I read Beowulf in Old English.

I think it was college. You can kind of figure it out. It takes a little effort. But he's got a great YouTube channel. So anyway, I'll have you on the show soon.

You can be my next interview, in fact. I'll contact you maybe on the Discord site and we'll figure it out. All right, guys. I think it's time to go. I'm going to go exercise.

Speaking of exercise, I don't want to become fat or lazy. So it's time to go exercise with a couple of babies. Baby training. Maybe I'll write a book.

Training with Babies by A.J. Hogue. Become a bestseller. All right. Lots of love to you. As always, join my VIP program at EffortlessEnglishClub.com. EffortlessEnglishClub.com.

Bye for now.