Coffee n Talk | American Independence, Pulling Your Weight

Welcome to the Effortless English Show with the world's number one English teacher, A.J. Hogue, where A.J. 's more than 40 million students worldwide finally learn English once and for all without the boring textbooks, classrooms, and grammar drills. Here's A.J.

with a quick piece to help you learn to speak fluent English effortlessly. I'm A.J. Hogue, the author of Effortless English, Learn to Speak English Like a Native.

Join my VIP program at EffortlessEnglishClub.com EffortlessEnglishClub.com Train your English, speak English fluently and powerfully at EffortlessEnglishClub.com

Independence! Independence, yo. It was recently Independence Day, I guess. Yesterday was Independence Day in the United States. The 4th of July, Independence Day, where we celebrate our independence, our declaration of independence from those horrible, terrible British...

Independence from the British. So the Declaration of Independence is one of our kind of important documents in America, American history. And it was basically a declaration of war.

A declaration of independence from the British Empire. Where the American colonies decided they were going to become independent. Goodbye to Britain. And of course this launched the Revolutionary War.

Which America won and became independent of. And that's why we celebrate it on July 4th, because that's the day of the official declaration. That is not the day we won. That is the day, really, that we officially started the war against the British.

The Declaration of Independence is a very famous document. It is not a legal document in the United States. It does not form the government. It was just a declaration.

Declaration means a statement. It's a statement of why we were leaving Britain. The legal document of the United States, right, that creates the government is the Constitution.

The Constitution of the United States, which was formed later when America was independent. It formed the official government of the United States, the U.S. Constitution.

That is the legal document, right? It creates the form of government that... However, this idea, you know, this word independence is very, very, very important for Americans and American culture. It goes beyond just being independent from the British Empire.

Of course, that's the first meaning. But this idea of independence is really... It's probably the number one American value, I would say, certainly one of them, that goes right to the heart of American culture.

Independence, another way to put this would be self-reliance. Self-reliance. You know, America was founded by people who left, primarily who left England.

Some for religious reasons, some for other reasons. But they left England... came to America, right away they're independent, right? They're not normal people and they had to survive in a very tough, hostile land.

They had to fight against the natives, the Indians. They had to survive all kinds of disasters and it created a very independent-minded people and culture so that the people...

were self-reliant they had to rely on themselves nobody was going to come and rescue them right if if they made mistakes with their growing their food nobody was going to rescue them if the indians attacked them nobody was going to rescue them

So they developed this mindset of self-reliance and independence that you have to be strong and tough and smart and you've got to be able to take care of yourself. It's the opposite of dependent. Dependent means you need someone else to take care of you.

It means you're weak. It means that you can't survive by yourself on your own. Whereas independence, self-reliance, is the idea that you're strong, that you can take care of yourself, you can handle yourself in difficult situations. It doesn't mean isolation.

Isolation means completely alone. That's not the idea. The idea, the American ideal, you know, the American idea of independence is that everybody... first can take care of themselves they're not parasites right they're the opposite of parasites that everybody has to contribute everyone has to be able to contribute and add something not just take take take you have to be able to give you have to be able to defend yourself you have to be able to survive on your own and it goes all the way back to the beginning there

And still continues today. You know, a lot of foreigners, for example, don't understand our Second Amendment, which is about the right to have and keep guns.

And honestly, we don't care what foreigners think about that because it's our country. If other people don't want to do that in their country, that's fine. But in America, it's very important. And again, it goes back to this mindset of independence, that you're not going to depend on the government or the police to protect you because honestly, they cannot protect you.

They can't. If someone attacks you on the street, if someone breaks into your house, the police will come much too late to save you. They can come after. Maybe they can catch the criminals.

Maybe not. But either way, you're hurt or you're dead. And... nobody's going to save you except yourself so this is the mindset again of self-reliance and independence that americans have that we're not going to rely on the government to do it because they can't and they won't that we got to rely on ourselves we got to take care of ourselves if we don't want to be a victim of crime well then we need to be able to fight back and defend ourselves

So, you know, this goes through lots of things. I think this is also this mindset of independence and self-reliance is the reason that entrepreneurs are so valued in American culture and kind of honored and they're looked up to like they're heroes in American culture. And being an entrepreneur is seen as a really great thing, even though most people don't do it. Most people are still kind of afraid to do it, honestly.

Yeah. But still, those who do start their own businesses, those who do become entrepreneurs, are mostly admired, right? It's seen as a very positive thing in the United States. Oh, wow, you're going on your own.

You're not dependent on an employer. You're not dependent on another company. You're going to be self-reliant, start your own. We like that. We value that.

That is seen as positive. I think part of this culture of independence also is connected to the idea of a meritocracy, what we'd call a meritocracy. Ocracy means, you know, like government rule by who has the power, right? So democracy is where, you know, everybody is ruling the country together.

But that's not a, you know, people sometimes describe America as a democracy. It's not a democracy. It has never been a democracy and it never will be.

It's a republic, which is different. But more generally, I would say Americans, in American culture, really values this idea of a meritocracy. Now again, this is an idea. It doesn't mean it's actually true everywhere.

In fact, it's not. For sure, it's not. But it's an ideal. It's seen as the best situation. A meritocracy. And that means that in a meritocracy, those who are the best go rise to the top, right?

It means if you work harder than other people, then you will generally be more successful. If you work smarter than other people, then generally you will be successful. That good performance is rewarded. That skill is rewarded.

This connects, again, back to this idea of independence, self-reliance, right? They're all connected and tied together. And again, I think they all go back to...

The early history of the United States and the people who founded the United States, those British, especially English, rebels, basically. I mean, think of how scary it must have been and difficult for those people.

because just the travel on the ships was super dangerous, you know, and miserable. Oh, there's this good movie. I can't remember the name of the movie, but it's a movie about some British people who get on a ship, an old wooden ship. So it's kind of back in that time period, generally.

And the whole movie is about their ride on their ship. They go to Australia and... And it kind of shows how miserable life was on those ships, how dangerous, how many people died from sickness, disease.

Brutal. It was terrible. Okay. It was a terrible, terrible way to travel. Okay. Nothing like our super comfortable travel we have now. And it was slow and it was difficult and a lot of people died doing it.

And then when they arrived, they arrived in a new world where there was very little civilization. So those were tough, tough, tough, tough, tough people.

It's hard for us now in modern world to even imagine how tough those people were. So those were the founders. And you can see why they valued that self-reliance, the meritocracy.

Because in that time period... If you were weak, if you were dependent, if you couldn't take care of yourself, you were a threat, right? Because you made the whole group weaker.

You made the whole group weaker. You could possibly cause other people to become hurt or killed if you could not, we say in English, a good idiom, pull your weight. To pull your weight. To

To pull your weight means do your part. It means contribute, right? It means do your work. Take care of your responsibilities in the group, you know, individually and as part of a group.

So like on a team, on a sports team, every individual player is expected to pull their weight, right? They're expected to do their job well, right? They pull their weight. And if someone does not pull their weight, if they don't pull their weight, it means they don't do their job well.

They don't take care of their responsibilities. They don't contribute to the group enough. And they make the group weaker. So if a team member does not pull their weight, the other team members usually get quite angry at them.

And... usually the coach will cut them from the team. You know, goodbye. You're making our team weaker. Goodbye. So this idea of pulling your own weight...

so that the whole team is stronger. This is, again, at the heart of this American idea of independence and self-reliance. And you could see why, in the early days, this was absolutely necessary just to survive.

You could see that if somebody came over from England... everybody struggling to survive if somebody came over and they were lazy if somebody came over and they just wanted everyone else to take care of them that you know this would have hurt the whole group it would have made it harder to survive for everybody so those people got eliminated

They probably got, you know, they got kicked out and they got killed or they were never welcomed or they got shamed and criticized and attacked until they pulled their own weight.

They just did not allow that. Now in our modern lazy world and life, unfortunately in America, we have a whole lot of people now who don't pull their own weight and

And there's a sort of a battle, a fight in America, in American culture and politics now with those people. And there's huge numbers of them. But still, you know, there is still a very large group in America who have this idea of a meritocracy, who have this idea that you have to pull your own weight. You have to be self-reliant and independent enough to pull your own weight.

Right. And for me personally, in this way, I am very, very, very American because I 100% agree. Absolutely. I value this idea of independence and self-reliance.

I believe it is one of the best values of the United States and American culture. It's one that I certainly appreciate from my own country. You know, no country's perfect. I could certainly talk long, long, long time about all the problems in America and things I don't necessarily like.

But this is one thing I like very much. And I think it is very special how strong this value is still, even now, in America. You know, I think this culture, for example, of self-reliance, which I grew up with, is certainly one of the things that encouraged me to start my own business and become an entrepreneur. It was just always in my head, right?

I was always around it. I was... From a fairly young age, meaning when I was a teenager starting in high school, I was reading books by entrepreneurs.

I was reading books about independence and self-reliance. Books like Thoreau, which is an entire, his book Walden is 100% about this value of self-reliance.

So because of that, even though no one in my direct life was an entrepreneur, no one in my family directly, like my parents were not, but still I was in this sort of culture that appreciates and encourages the idea of being an entrepreneur. So I think that that certainly had an influence, a very positive influence on me, and I'm happy about that.

And I also very much value this idea of pulling your weight. And I just have a very... A natural hatred is maybe too strong a word. Maybe disgust is the right word. Disgust is like...

I kind of disgust and natural disgust for parasites. For people who just want to take and take and take and take. And they don't give. They don't pull their weight.

And most parasites who do that have this attitude, which I recently talked about, in terms of kids, that you have to be careful about. This attitude of entitlement, of I deserve, I deserve to be given everything. Just because I'm here and alive, that means everybody else has to take care of me. Everybody else has to give me stuff.

And if I'm having problems, everybody else has to solve my problem. That attitude disgusts me. Okay? I don't like it. Maybe hatred is a good word. I really do hate that attitude.

And, you know, maybe a good part of that is because I grew up in this American culture of self-reliance. Pulling your own weight. Pull your own weight.

But I very much believe that this is a great value that creates great prosperity and strength and happiness for both groups and individuals. That it just works better.

You know, for individuals, people who are dependent, people who play at being a victim, people who are parasites, they're unhappy people. I mean, the ones I have met, and I've met a good number, they're miserable. They're really, really unhappy people because at the heart, to say you are...

entitled to say you are a victim and focus on all the bad stuff people have done to you to be a parasite this all these things are are signs of weakness. It's a valuing weakness. It means you're weak.

It means you can't take care of yourself. And that means you're going to be unhappy. You're going to feel powerless in the end. It's a mindset of powerlessness.

And that's why they're so miserable. That's why people who are dependent, who don't pull their weight in any way, that's why they are... So miserable, so unhappy. It's because of this mindset of powerlessness.

Because if you're powerless, if you're a victim, it means you can't do anything to change. You can't change your life. You can't change your situation. You can't improve anything because you're powerless.

You just have to hope that someone else will do it for you or beg or cry and scream that someone else must do it for you. Sometimes that works. Maybe the other people feel guilty or they feel bad or they feel pity for you and maybe they will help you.

But maybe they won't. Maybe they won't, and often they won't. And often what happens as the number of parasites grow in a culture or a country, and they get more and more and more and more, and they start demanding more and more and more, what happens is finally the people who are pulling their own weight, the people who are taking care of things,

They will suddenly change before they felt pity, before they felt compassion and kindness towards these other people. But if the parasites just grow and start demanding more and more and get more and more rude, what happens is finally something changes very fast and nobody cares anymore. In fact, they start to hate the parasites. They start to get angry at the parasites and they stop helping them.

And then the parasites are helpless because their whole life they've been... you know you're trying to be a victim and making themselves powerless and having this mindset of powerlessness and then they become true victims of themselves because the other people the productive people the independent and self-reliant people just stop caring

I can definitely see this happening in the United States now. And I understand it completely. And honestly, I feel the same. I just don't care anymore about the people crying, about being victims.

I feel nothing for them anymore. Because before, where I felt some compassion, now they just seem to be parasites who are screaming, give me, give me, give me more, more, more. They've become rude. They've become aggressive.

And And I'm a super nice guy, so when someone like me just gets disgusted and thinks enough, then it's a sign that lots of other people probably are going to do the same and are doing the same.

So this is no way to live your life. This is no way to live your life to make yourself into a victim, even if things have happened to you that are bad.

Even when you were young, when you were too young to defend yourself, you were hurt and abused. Even then, you have to have a mindset of self-reliance, of strength, of independence. A lot of people who were abused as children grow up to be strong. They use those terrible things as motivation to overcome, to grow stronger, to help other people, to contribute to

They become great people. So it's no excuse. Even when bad things happen, even if something terrible happens to you, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

And eventually all of us, all of us, every single human being must face loss, must face sadness, must face grief, must face aging. And of course all of us will die.

So there's no escape for any of us. So trying to have a mindset of being some kind of victim, like, oh, poor me, poor me. It just, you know, I know that for some people it feels good for a little while. You think you can get some sympathy from people, but then you're being dependent.

You're dependent on them helping you. You're dependent on their sympathy, and it will run out. It's not unlimited. So this is why... I love effortless English members and family members because you are independent learners, right, in the area of education.

This mindset, this value is strong everywhere in every part of life. In education, right? You can be a dependent learner or an independent learner. As a dependent learner, which is what the schools create and encourage, what do you do?

Oh, well, you depend on the teacher. You depend on the school system to tell you what to do, right? Oh, they tell you what time to come. They tell you which room to go to.

They tell you which teacher is going to teach you. You sit down. The teacher tells you what you're going to learn. The teacher tells you what activities you must do.

The teacher tells you which book you must read. The teacher tells you which page to read on which days. The teacher tells you exactly what you must study. This is dependence, and it makes students weak and mindless and passive.

And I have seen this so many times with young people in the United States. They're so passive, they can't make decisions. They can't make decisions about their life.

They're 18 or 19 or 20 or 21. And they are terrified, terrified, so afraid to make any decision about their life, about choosing a certain job, about not going to college or going to college, about what they should study or not study, about taking some chance, about starting a business or not starting a business, about traveling or not traveling. They're afraid to make any decisions because...

They've been dependent learners since early childhood until 18 or 22 or whatever. And this dependence has made them weak, weak, weak, weak, weak. On the other hand, you are an independent learner.

You're learning English independently. That means you decide how much you study or listen properly. Just on Twitter, just the last couple days, had a few of our really energetic and motivated Effortless English family members sharing that they are starting to think in English, that they wake up in the morning thinking in English or have a dream in English.

And they're listening to Effortless English, you know, for hours each day. Eight hours a day, seven hours a day. Some people. You don't have to do that, of course, but the point is you're independent.

So you decide. They decided they want to do seven hours a day, eight hours a day, just super energy, super enthusiasm, and they're getting fantastic results.

I didn't tell them to do that. They did it because they're independent. They're self-reliant. Now others have busier lives maybe or they don't have that much time or not that motivated.

And that's fine too. That's the whole point. You decide. Maybe two hours a day is enough for you. Maybe two hours a day is good for your goals and what you want.

Great. Guess what? Again, you're the boss. You decide. That makes you stronger. As an independent learner, you're stronger because you're doing it. So even if it takes you longer than someone who does eight hours, of course, you'll need longer than them.

But it doesn't matter. You will achieve success. And when you achieve it, you'll know that you did it. It was you. You did it. It's the same with effortless English.

I didn't force you to listen to this podcast. I didn't force you to watch my videos. I didn't force you to get my book and listen to my audio book. I didn't force you to join my VIP program.

I didn't force you to get my Power English course, listen to my Power English course, train with my pronunciation course. I didn't force you to do any of that. You chose to do those things.

You chose, which means you're the strong one, not me. I'm just your coach. I'm just a helper. I made these things to help you. But you decided. You decided.

You've probably tried many different methods of learning English. Because you're independent. You're not passive. You didn't just go to classes again and again and again.

You finally decided that's not working. That's not working. That's not effective. Because you're an independent thinker. And you're a self-reliant learner.

So you decided to take action yourself. Stop waiting for teachers and schools to tell you what to do. You made the decisions yourself. You tried things.

You investigated things. Maybe you tried some things that didn't work. That's great. That's also part of being independent. That's no problem at all. That's called experimenting.

You know, it's testing, experimenting. Again, you did that because you're independent. You are independent. So good for you. And because you're an independent learner, you're getting better results.

You get better results for a few reasons. Number one, eventually you find better methods, which is what you're doing. Instead of just hoping that a school will use a good method, you go out there and you're searching the internet and trying things and you find better methods.

You have found better methods and you're using them now. That's why you're getting better results. The other reason you're getting better results is because as an independent learner, you must develop your own motivation, right? Because nobody makes you do anything.

You can get up and be lazy every day if you want to. You're not going to a class. You're not going to get a grade. So nobody's pushing you or forcing you to listen to effortless English two hours a day or five hours a day or whatever.

You have to develop that yourself. And in the beginning, that feels difficult. Why does it feel difficult? Because you were trained in schools to be dependent.

So getting that motivation going, you know, in the beginning, I understand it does kind of, it feels a little tough. But once you develop it, you train it in yourself, then your mind becomes stronger. Your emotions become stronger. Your motivation becomes stronger for English, but also in general, in all areas of your life.

This is one of the cool things about independent learning is that this motivation, this independence, this self-reliance, this strength and power you develop will affect all parts of your life, not only English.

So in the beginning, yes, you're just developing your strength. In the beginning, you're developing your motivation. In the beginning, you're developing your self-reliance. In the beginning, you're developing your personal power just for English.

But quite quickly... That power and independence and self-reliance begins to go into other parts of your life. Maybe it goes into your health and fitness.

You start to have more motivation, more independence, more self-reliance, taking care of your body, taking care of your health. Again, you don't need anybody to tell you what to do. You just go do it.

You take control of your own life. You take mastery of your own life. And then maybe that starts to go into your financial life. Money. Money. So you start to take control of your income, control of your money.

You start reading books like Rich Dad, Poor Dad. You start to cut your expenses down to baseline. You start to save the extra money. You start looking at investments, learning business skills or investing skills.

You start to become more financially independent. Independent. And when you do, you are happier. You are happier when you are more independent and self-reliant and strong.

But here's the cool thing. It's not a lonely thing. It's not isolation. It's about, again, pulling your own weight. It doesn't mean you must do everything alone.

Of course not. We humans are social. We need each other. It means that you pull your own weight. It means you are contributing to your group. Your first group is your family.

I mean, do you want to be a parasite to your family? Do you just want to suck away their energy and their love and their care and their money and their time and give nothing back? Is that what you want? Of course not.

Of course not. Of course you don't want to do that. You want to contribute to your family, right? You want to make your family stronger. If you're married and have kids and you become financially free and...

make your whole family financially stronger that benefits everybody the whole family benefits your wife or husband your children maybe your parents right maybe your whole extended family benefits from that in some way at some level it's the same with being healthy

When you're healthy, when you become independent with your health, your energy goes up. You get stronger. You feel better. Guess what? That affects your emotions.

It affects your mind. You will be a generally happier person. And that also helps your family. Right? So, of course, your family enjoys you more, benefits more when you are happy and energetic than if you are sick and weak all the time.

Right? Or... emotionally weak all the time so this is the great thing about being an independent learner self-reliant is that you change you change from taking taking taking all the time to giving and

to creating the abundance, to creating the happiness, to creating the success in your life that you want. You create it, and then you share it with those you care about.

And that's happiness, and that's love. And that's why it's powerful, and that's why it's such a powerful and important value. Say hi to me on Instagram, Effortless English Club on Instagram, Effortless English Club on Instagram.

And of course, join my VIP program at EffortlessEnglishClub.com, EffortlessEnglishClub.com.