Why Do I Have to Do Everything?

How are you? Well, happy, happy, happy, happy Friday, man. I am fired up today for sure. I've had to start this podcast. I think this is time number seven.

I am so over the top. I've got to pull myself back. But this is it. I'm not. This is it. I don't know. It is The Daily Boost. It's me, Scott Smith, the nicest rebel you'll ever meet, right?

No doubt about that. I am a little bit of a hot mess sometimes. I am, but I'm a hell of a lot of fun to hang out with. I'm one of those guys that I like to have fun.

I like to live a joyful, kind life, the whole thing. I'm very smart, I think. I'm very, very funny. You know that. We get together and we start doing stuff, we're going to have a lot of fun.

We're going to eat bad food sometimes, eat good food sometimes. We're going to make a lot of jokes sometimes. They're going to be politically incorrect. We're going to get on the woke thing.

It's just going to happen. At the same time, we're going to do it compassionately. We're going to give each other space. We're going to have a good time.

We're going to go very deep and we're going to go, man, that was one of the most interesting conversations I've had. That's how I like to roll, man. I'm glad to have you here.

By the way, I hang out at motivationandmove.com. That's where my stuff is. My podcast thing, it's this little thing I've been doing 20 years. It's not very big.

My coaching program, just a little thing I've been doing 20 years. Some free stuff. It's over there, too. Go over there and get it. So yesterday, I kind of made a mistake.

I opened my mouth. Like, that's the first time that's happened. And I said, hey, let's get together. I have not gotten together for at least a year. It's been a long time.

Just lazy. No, actually not. I actually enjoy my life. I enjoy the people I'm working with. And to put together an event to talk and stuff, that's a lot of work, right?

And I'm just like, I don't want to do it. I like the people I'm working with. I show up. We do our thing. I don't want to do anything else. But I do now.

So we're going to do it. So we're going to get together. Here's official date, June 11th at 2 p.m. Eastern. I'm going to do a, I don't know what to call it.

It's not a webinar. It's not a workshop. You've heard me do my Face Your Fashion Inner Circle. You've heard me talk about that. It's a guided coaching program.

It's where I facilitate these calls, much like I do on the podcast. I teach you stuff. I challenge you. I give you homework. I give you frameworks. I drive you through the call.

There's no sales pitch on this call at all. It's actual, a live inner circle coaching call. And maybe some of my inner circle members will show up. I, I've not even told them about this shit, so they might show up.

And the other component is that not only may they show, but then you're going to show in a bunch of other people. And this is where the mastermind component comes together. And my ability, I'm just going to say, I'm pretty damn good at getting a conversation going and guiding that conversation as well. And you guys get to know each other.

And man, man, You get a proximity to people who think like you do, and they got your back. And after a couple of weeks of getting to know them, it's so freaking powerful. It really is.

I love this call. I love this group. But we need a few new members. I've not been promoting, so I figure I'll open the doors, right? So do this. Why don't you just make plans to be there June 11th at 2 p.m.

I will open official registrations on Monday, but you can go to motivation2move.com and sign up for anything. You'll be on my list, and I will send you an invitation. And we only take 100 people. I don't think I'm doing a replay.

I don't think so. I figure I'm going to, the serious people will find a way to show up. I will give you exactly, I will so, listen, your time is worth something. How much do you make per hour?

What, $7,000 an hour? I'll make it worth that. I will. So don't worry about that. But I'll talk more about it on Monday, okay? Again, thanks for your patience.

Give me a chance to talk about this. We'll figure we'll talk about it for a week or so and then disappear again. Get back to stuff. So anyway, what happened this week?

Let's see. It was so cool. Okay. I was on a call. We had a client. And I actually had a kind of a personal reference with this as well, which was kind of interesting.

And let me actually had two personal clients and one personal thing with this one this week. We were on this call about people who had gotten in a position. They had offered to do something, in many cases a long time ago.

They are doing the something. The something is getting kind of crazy now. And they're feeling a little bit upset by it. but they're still doing the something and we have to figure out how to deal with it.

Now, let me give you the context for this because that was kind of no context at all. I'll start with my mom. About 22 years ago, my sister offered to take care of my mom as she got older. My mom moved into, they built a little mother-in-law apartment on her house and the deal was if they took care of her until she died,

that they could keep the apartment they built. And that was their payment for taking care of them. And we liked that because mom got to live with her daughter and it was good stuff. But I knew in the beginning that eventually mom would not be that age.

Eventually she would be where she is now, which is 94. And eventually the price would have to be paid. And boy, is it right now. Mom's great. She's healthy, but she's 94.

So, you know, stuff happens, right? So my sister's having all these, you know, challenges and I'm helping her work through those. But I also had it with somebody else, another client too. Same thing.

And of course, there's other siblings, not in my case. My older brother died a couple of years back. But five years ago, I think now, a little while. I don't think I ever mentioned that, but yeah, he passed away.

But in my client situation, you know, you have siblings and you know the siblings and maybe you're like this too. You're the one that's going to take care of the older parents because that's what you do.

Maybe you have the house. Maybe you have the resources. Maybe it's just in your heart. Maybe it's just you're the one that does that. And you step up to do it.

And suddenly you got your other people that pop in once a year on a vacation. Hey, you're going to come in and check in mom and dad. And I had these conversations this week. I did.

I'm anonymizing them, obviously. But we had the conversations. And you're like, man, why am I doing all the work? Why am I stuck doing this? Why? And the answer is because you started it.

Because you decided to do it. Because you wouldn't have it any other way. Because nobody can do it better than you can. And now the roosters are coming home to roost, right?

It's just how it is. You had a plan, and now the plan is rolled here, and now you're in the muck of it. And I don't care what you're doing for a living.

I don't care what you do for your personal life. It doesn't matter how good it is, how good the plan is. Have you ever noticed this? When you set off on doing anything at all, that it's going to get to be a hot mess at some point.

And whatever reason you thought you were going to get in it for, you're going to get challenged by it. And then you look at other people and you're like, why aren't they helping? Why aren't they doing this? And yet you're in it and you offered to do it.

And that's been my advice. It's happening right now. And you decided to do it. So own the mother. Okay. Man, I almost went, I almost did. I almost did.

I almost got street on your butt, didn't I? Go on the mofos. I almost said worse than that, okay? So the thing is, I know it's a pain. I know it's, but you wouldn't have it any other way, would you?

If my mom called, if my sister called today and said, can you take her? I'd take her in a flash, but I know something. I'd hate it, and it'd be hard. But at the end of the day, I'd be glad I did.

But it wouldn't be easy along the way. And most of the things I find in life that are halfway worth doing are like that. They're very challenging. And you wonder why.

Why do I have to go through this to do what I think is a good thing? Let me answer the question for you exactly. I have no idea. I'm not God. Well, sometimes I sound like that.

I don't know. Put the God voice on. That's not good. So a lot of times ago, there was something called the Eisenhower Matrix. You may think of this more like the Stephen Covey four quadrant thing.

And this is what I've been bringing up this week to the folks I've been talking to. And as I've navigated it, because again, I'm navigating it personally myself now. I've had two different clients, which tells me, okay, something's in the wind right now. If that's happening, it means I'm probably talking to somebody else right now, but it's happening.

So the first thing I said was, well, you chose it. It is what it is. And I'll step in and support it. But you chose it. You're the best that can do it.

You're glad you're here. It'll pass eventually. It's going to happen. But in Stephen Covey and the Eisenhower matrix, we have a couple of quadrants. Quadrant one is the important and urgent crisis and deadlines.

That's what that is. Client emergency, burst pipe, things like that. Things to do right now. And if you're taking care of somebody, particularly if an elder parent, you know there's going to be these important urgent times, like when your mom falls out of bed five times.

Okay, here you go. That's urgent and important. You're going to do it. You got to do it. Now, Stephen Covey taught this a long time ago, that when you're in the urgent and important quadrant, then you just got to deal with it.

It's okay to put everything else on the side. And what most of us do is like, man, it's getting in the way. It's getting in the way. Well, here's the thing.

About 20 years ago, you decided to take on the responsibility and it's been okay. It's been managed. It's been important and not urgent for about 20 years. And suddenly it's important and urgent.

It's not in the way. It's what you decided to do. It's just flaring itself right now. So what do you do? Well, everything else gets put aside for the moment and you deal with urgent and important.

That's what you do. Also, if you happen to have a longer big term picture, say you have a longer goal or something you want to accomplish over maybe 10 or 20 years, it doesn't really matter in the big picture. You just take care of whatever has to happen today because mom fell out of bed. You know, eventually she won't be here and eventually you'll just be moving on with your life.

Quadrant two is the important and the not urgent stage. And this is where you want to be almost all the time. Important and not urgent. You're working on important stuff.

You're doing important things, but there's no urgency to it whatsoever. That's where I try to live and you should live. And I'm there, I'm there like 98% of the time, probably a hundred percent. Cause I don't care about the other 2%.

So, but that's just me. So it's, it's not nice. It's not even totally true, but it's got a little truth in it. You know, it does. It's like when I say, I don't care.

You know, I care, right? But I don't care, but I do. You get it, right? You're my peeps. You get it. All right. Number three, quadrant three, not important and urgent.

Ew, buddy. This is the place you want to be. Not important and urgent. It's a place you don't want to be, I should say. I misspoke. What's the word for this?

The great deceiver. Most interruptions, they're, man, hey, got a sec, stuff like that. Got to check your mail. You know, you're working on not important stuff, but you're treating it like it's the most urgent thing on the planet.

I have done that, and I will fall into that so easily. It's like it really has no importance, but I got to do it. I made an app last week. I made it in 15 hours.

There was an app that I wanted to make. I always wanted to make a Macintosh app. And there's a particular presentation software that nobody else makes. I wanted to do it for like 20 years.

And I decided I was going to make it and see if I could. And damn it if I didn't. 15 hours, I had it done. And my wife's like, what are you doing? I said, I really shouldn't be doing this.

You really don't have to. But I did it. It was urgent to me, but had no importance whatsoever. But now that it's done, I got a commercial property. My clients are getting it too.

It's awesome. I'll share it with you someday. Maybe next week on the call, I'll share it with you. What's the final quadrant? Not important, not urgent.

This is the time suck. My guess is you spend a time mindless and scrolling, right? Busy work that feels productive but isn't. Just get rid of them. I'm human.

And sometimes I just want to live in a not important, not urgent zone. I do. I told my son, my son-in-law, I said, that's why I go fishing. It's not important.

It's not urgent. What are you saying? That's blasphemy. I forgot. He's a fisherman. To me, it's not important. It's like, whatever. So no matter what you're going on with your life, right?

If you've stepped into it, like they got married, guess what? Chickens are going to come home to roost. You got kids. You're going to get multiple chickens coming home to broost.

First child gets your attention. Second child goes, oh, crap. What? happen. Anything you do happens this way. So when you decide to get into something, which is one of the reasons a lot of people don't decide to get into things.

But if you're like me, there are certain things that I can't stop you from doing and you're going to do it anyway. That's a decision. You commit to it. You push it up there and you start doing it.

It just happens. So what do we do about this? I don't know. Well, I do. But you know what I mean by that? See, no matter how much we get psychologically sound here and we dig deep and we get all the hacks and text Andrew Huberman and see what he says and all that stuff.

What do you think, Andrew? No matter how much we do that, have you ever learned that the next day, however smart you were the day before, it's like they reset. It's like Groundhog Day every single day. But I thought I had it all figured out.

I thought I'd have this perfect. Then, nope, there's something else to figure out. Something else happens. Man, it's just life. To me, that's the most grounding statement I can make to you.

It's just life. And when you gravitate yourself and get yourself to the point where you understand that, that we don't even understand maybe why we're here and why this is happening. And this whole purpose, passion thing that we're going after is kind of like, well, is that even a real thing? Or is this something we're all chasing?

We're just kind of here. Nobody really knows why we're here. Nobody knows where we go when we're not here anymore. But the point is, we just get up every single bed, out of bed every single day and just try to figure it out, make the best of it.

And to me, I think that's the whole goal of life. I think life is wisdom. I think life is being born, dealing with all these things that happen and just try to figure it out every single day. And eventually you figure it out or you die.

And it doesn't matter because, well, all right, you figured out that much stuff and you just ran out of time. It doesn't matter. The real tragedy is when you don't try to figure this stuff out and then you die. Not to me.

That's dying before you die. I like that. Dude, this is an upbeat, positive Friday show. What are you thinking, Scott? The fact of the matter is, you just heard exactly what I'm thinking.

I don't even have to explain it. There it is. Have a great weekend. I'll see you. What? Monday.