BE 646: Do You Find Yourself Only Talking About Work?

This is the Business English Podcast, Episode 646. Do you find yourself only talking about work? Welcome to the Business English Podcast from All Ears English. Get the English skills you need to achieve your dreams in global business.

For a presentation, a meeting, or your office party, this is Real Business English with your favorite American hosts, Lindsay and Aubrey, coming to you from Arizona and Colorado, USA.

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Hello, Lindsay. How are you today? Great today. How are you? How's it going? Excellent question for you. Do you know anyone who only talks about work?

Not as much as I used to. I feel like when I lived in New York and Boston, that was like the primary question that people talked about. What do you do? But here in Colorado, actually, what do you do means like what activity on the weekend do you do?

Do you snowboard? Do you ski? Do you bike? Do you climb? It's a very interesting conversation. I do want to know where people work. But beyond that, if you're not in the same field, but even if you're coworkers, even if you work at the same place, it often can get to where you're like, do we have to keep talking about work?

Yeah. You need to build that relationship. Right. I see what you mean. So sometimes on this show, we talk about relationships at work and you can only go so far with your relationship with your coworkers by staying within the work boundaries.

Exactly. Yes. So we got a great question about this that we are going to answer today. We want you to be able to talk with coworkers and also everyone else in your life about lots of different things, lots of different topics.

And we want to give you the skills, the strategies to pick pivot from talking about work to something else. Pivot. I love that word. I am excited to find out because I think that might be the challenge for many of our listeners.

That is the challenge. You know, how do you, right? How do you not get locked into the work topic? So today's question comes from Konichiwa Hasegawa from YouTube.

Guys, don't forget the All Ears English podcast is over on YouTube. Go ahead and type in All Ears English into YouTube, find our show and hit subscribe. We'd love to have you watch our episodes. It's a great way to consume our show.

Okay? Absolutely. Aubrey, could you read the question? Yes. The question is, hi, thank you for providing us with a very good podcast to improve English skills.

I have a question. How do you have so many topics to talk about other than questions for us? For me, I usually talk with online English tutors, but these days I feel like I'm lacking topics to talk with them. I'm so tired of thinking of topics every time.

After all, I'm only good at talking about my business things because I speak about them so many times. But besides that, my speaking is still not fluent.

I felt this in my soul. It's so interesting how often we're talking with coworkers about work. When we're at a party, when we're talking with friends, that's usually the first thing we catch up about. So we've

find ourselves really comfortable talking about what we do at work, even in a second language, right? But then we try to branch into other topics and we get stuck. Like, what do I even ask? What do I even talk about?

Yeah, we can get stuck for sure. It helps when we kind of know what kind of party we're at. Like the other night I was at a Spanish meetup. And for me, the obvious topics were where, you know, talking about living abroad, traveling abroad.

It was an advanced Spanish meetup. So people had lived and traveled long periods of time, studied abroad. So sometimes we can get context clues from who is coming to this event, what kinds of people are here and what kinds of topics would work. Yeah, that's true.

And if you're at work, especially with coworkers, because you have work in common, it's easy to only talk about work or start at work, but often you're in a more social setting, like the break room grabbing coffee or lunch or at happy hour, and you need to be able to chat about other things as well. So we're going to share great questions for a bunch of different topics that you can use to start a conversation. Then we're going to give you some phrases to pivot to that conversation away from work.

I'm looking forward to this. There might be a cultural layer here too, right? So what we're showing you here is what works in American business culture. It may be different in your culture.

So you may be taking those norms into maybe doing business with English speakers, which might be part of the challenge. So we're getting into lots of cultural stuff, lots of connection stuff. But first, guys, hit that follow button. Aubrey, why should they follow the show?

Yes, we have three new episodes every week with interesting vocabulary and strategies that will help you not only be successful at work, but to be social at work, to build these connections with coworkers and clients to build your network. So hit follow wherever you find your podcasts. All right. Let's talk about the pivot then, right?

So what are some easy everyday topics that we might think about bringing up? Yeah. So first of all, weekend plans, right? You could just ask, did you do anything fun this weekend?

So imagine you're sitting in the break room. We're going to share in a minute how to pivot away from work because often that's where we start, right? Someone's like, how's the project going? How's work going?

And you fill each other in. But then once you pivot to another conversation, there's lots of different topics. You don't have to be stuck with one thing. So weekend plans, food and restaurants, you could say, have you tried any good restaurants lately?

Mm-hmm. Movies and TV, have you been watching anything good lately? And I like the present perfect here, the present perfect progressive here. Have you been watching anything good lately?

We could also say, have you watched anything good lately, I guess, could work too, right? Right. That feels a little more like you've finished the show and have you been watching is more like, what are you currently watching? What have you started?

Yeah, both work. I love this question. I love when someone, because I always have something to say if I'm watching a show. Yeah. Or music. What kind of music do you usually listen to?

Yeah. So you can always ask about travel. Do you have any trips coming up or have you taken any fun trips lately? Yeah. Especially if you know that person likes to travel.

We might know, we might have some clues about the person just based on, I don't know, what they put on their profile on the website, for example, right? So we can kind of ask this question if we know the person's a traveler. Maybe if we think they like to stay home more, we choose something else. Exactly, right?

You have all kinds of topics here. That's a good point, Lindsay. Whatever you learn about coworkers and friends, you want to remember, you want to pay attention so that you know which of these questions is likely to strike or they're going to be like, have something fun to say. Not all of these will yield...

the best results. One or two of them will work for each person. They're fine. They're fine questions. They're general. They're good. But some will really work well.

Others will just be fine. Some of them, if you don't know anything about somebody yet, you could start with the weather. Just say, can you believe how hot it's been? And then a couple quick phrases about the weather.

And then you could dive into one of these others. Right. Yeah. And even if they just say like, no, I haven't really had time to watch TV shows yet. What about you?

Right. Even if their answer is no, this will still spark a fun conversation. Yeah. Maybe in a second episode, Aubrey, we could go into the next question.

So these are like, for example, do you have any pets? That would be a first time question. And then they tell you about their dog, right? And then the next time you run into that person, you say, how's the pup?

How's the pup? Right? Love that. Yes. The follow-up, right? There's a few skills here, remembering what they've told you, remembering that they have a dog and then having that follow-up question.

Okay. Really good. Like exercise. Did you do anything? Do you do anything to stay active? Yeah. And then once you find out if they lift weights, for example, right, be like, have you hit the gym a lot lately?

Or you could share with them and be like, oh, I've actually started lifting. And then you share that way. Exactly. Or have you been to any good events around here recently?

Yeah. right? So maybe you're new to a city and you want to ask about new events to go to. Okay. Yes. And so those are very casual, almost like that small talk to start the conversation.

If you've had a couple conversations or if you've been chatting for a while, there are topics that can lead to deeper conversations if there's time for it, if the relationship's getting there. So let's share some more, some of these. Okay. So for travel, now you know the person, you've already asked about the travel experiences.

The next question could be, what's the best trip you've ever taken? Right? Right. Yeah. This goes a little bit beyond like any fun trips planned, right?

Then we're getting a little like, what about, this might bring up childhood. What's the best trip you've ever taken? It might be something from when they were a kid. Or you could ask about their childhood.

What did you enjoy doing when you were a kid? Or where did you grow up? Or books and podcasts, if you know you have a reader in front of you or a podcast listener, have you read or listened to anything interesting lately? You would choose one of the two, obviously, read or listened to.

Exactly right. Have you read anything interesting lately or are you into any fun podcasts? I like to ask, what's in your podcast listening queue? What's in your queue, right?

That's fun. Yes, absolutely. That's a great question. Most everybody. And if they're not into podcasts, it's pretty easy. They'll either ask you a question or you can be like, oh yeah, are you more of a book reader?

What books are you into? Right. Exactly. Or what genre do you like? Or with tech, this one's kind of broad. I think I would need to be in more of a contextual conversation here, right?

Do you think AI is going to change the way we work? Yeah, this could be if you already happen to start talking about maybe you've introduced something that's AI at work, right? Something's changing. Then you could get a little deeper like, oh, do you feel like that's going to change how things work around here?

Right. Work-life balance. So what do you usually do to unwind? Unwind is a key bonus phrase. Unwind meaning to relax, Aubrey, right? Yes. I love this verb.

Yeah. What do you like to do to unwind after work? Yeah, this is fun. And it could be different for anybody. And then you're going to find out more about their hobbies, what they do in their free time.

And then around the new year, certainly people are asking the question, is there anything you're hoping to do this year? The first week of the year, people might be having this conversation in the break room.

It's not always just what's your new year's resolution because people don't love that, right? They roll their eyes. But what are you hoping to do this year, right? Yeah, I love that.

That's a good point. The new year is coming up. Not everybody makes resolutions, right? But you can just be like, you know, what are you hoping to accomplish?

What's a fun goal you have for this year? Mm-hmm. Anything else, Aubrey? Yeah. And then cultural differences are interesting, right? If someone has moved there recently and you want to ask for some kind of comparison for where they used to live, right?

What's something about this city that surprised you? Something like that might be interesting. Yes. Or when it comes to learning, is there anything you'd like to learn how to do?

And again, it's strange to see these out of context because these would all have to be in the middle of a conversation where we've opened up that topic. Right. Maybe you're already talking about hobbies. Yeah.

This is a way to get deeper in a topic. Yeah. Yeah, you wouldn't just go up to someone, even if you've talked to them the Monday before, it's the following Monday, you wouldn't just open up this topic, right? You would get into it over time.

So yeah, these are not the first thing you'd say to someone, right? If you've already, maybe a little bit of small talk, you've already found out a little bit about their hobbies, what they're doing this weekend, and you start talking about something they've learned recently, hobbies they've picked up, that's them when you might ask, what's something you've always wanted to start, but haven't had the time, something like that. Yeah, exactly. Let's take a quick break and then we'll be right back.

And when you hold back, people don't see the real you. You don't need perfect grammar. You need clarity about what is holding you back. In just two minutes, you can discover your English level and what's slowing your progress for free.

Go to allearsenglish.com slash fluency score. That's allearsenglish.com slash F-L-U-E-N-C-Y-S-C-O-R-E. Okay, Aubrey. Now, when we pivot, tell us what the pivot is again.

What does this mean? Pivot. Yes. This is a vital conversational skill for smoothly changing the subject, right? To pivot, especially from talking about work to another topic without it being rude, right?

Because you don't want to give them the impression that you don't want to hear about what they're doing at work or you're bored with what they're saying. That's not the goal here. The goal is to give yourselves something else to talk about and to change the subject, to pivot from work to one of these topics we shared that are great for conversations. Yeah.

So there are three ways. Well, there are many ways, but we're going to show you three ways you can do it today. The first one is speaking of. So for example, speaking of being busy, have you taken any vacations lately?

Okay. Yes. That's an easy one. Often, how's work been going? Oh, I'm swamped. It's been crazy. Speaking of being busy, have you gone any fun vacations lately?

Right? That works. It's an easy way to change the subject. Yes, exactly. Or speaking of long meetings, have you noticed how long movie previews have been getting?

So maybe someone complained that that meeting was so long. Now you're having coffee after the meeting. Speaking of long meetings, right? Have you noticed how long movie previews have been getting?

Maybe you're asking for movie recommendations now. Pivoting exactly from there, it's going to jump into a fun conversation, but you've segued, right? That pivot is taking you from you're like, oh man, that meeting was so long. Speaking of long meetings, right?

This is just a fun way to transition to talking about movies. Yeah, exactly. And that reminds me is our second way to pivot. So we're going to use this when something the person said makes you think of another topic.

This happens a lot. People move around all the time. We don't follow a thread all the way through. Most people don't. Exactly. Right. So you could just say, that reminds me, are you still planning that trip to Italy?

And this is where, like you were saying, Lindsay, you guys have clearly talked about travel before. This person mentioned they're planning a trip to Italy. And that's part of the skill here is to remember that so that you can ask them about it. Remember it.

Exactly. Or that reminds me, have you seen the new movie everyone's talking about? So some kind of reminder about the movie came up. A little less personal, right?

But also a good question. Yeah. So these are sort of the trick is to have something they're saying, something you're saying, right? We're sharing a little bit about work and then take something that you have in common, something that was mentioned.

Be like, oh, that reminds me. And then you move to any of these other topics about hobbies, travel, movies, anything that would be interesting to chat about. Yeah. And then what's the last one, Aubrey?

Way to pivot. Last way to pivot. Yes. The last one is, by the way, right? Oh, by the way, did you find that new apartment or weren't you looking for a new apartment?

Again, this is something where you're remembering something they've already shared with you. Or, oh, by the way, have you tried that new coffee shop? Okay. All right.

So we've given our listeners a lot of ways to pivot, a lot of topics, a lot of content today, Aubrey. Let's go into a role play, shall we? And bring it all together into a real conversation. Let's do it.

You and I are coworkers eating lunch in the break room here. I'll start us out. Okay. How's the new project going? Pretty well, actually. We had a few problems at first, but I think we finally got everything under control.

Oh, good to hear. Hopefully the rest of it goes smoothly. Yeah. I'm hoping to wrap it up by the end of the month. Nice. Oh, that reminds me. Are you still planning to take some time off next month?

I am. I'm going to visit my sister in California. Oh, nice. How long are you staying? About a week. I haven't seen her in almost two years. Oh, I'm glad you'll be able to visit.

What do you usually do with her when you visit? Okay, good. All right. So more typical, right? So now we're seeing the full context of the full conversation here.

Exactly. Because you don't want to be choppy and jumping from one thing to other awkwardly. You can see, right? I first am asking about work. I know about this project.

We have this in common and I'm not going to immediately pivot, right? We're going to have a little bit of go back and forth. And then this, the key here to say, that reminds me, are you still planning to take some time off next month? And then we're going to talk about upcoming trips.

Exactly. And that's the pivot right there. It feels so natural. That is the key. That's the key takeaway. That's what we want you guys to remember today is these, because the topics are going to change.

You can decide what's an interesting topic depending on the person, but how do we pivot? That's what really matters to make it sound natural. Yes. And you have a whole list here of really interesting things you could talk about with anyone.

Coworkers, new people you've met at a networking event, as well as someone you've chatted about a while. We've given you a fun question to get a little bit deeper. Yeah. So in terms of connection, guys, I mean, don't assume the person doesn't want to go beyond work.

Maybe they also just don't know how to bring up that topic. So you can take the leadership role here and drive it now that you have these pivoting phrases, three pivoting phrases, take a chance, right? See how you can get to know. You'll feel much more connected to the person the next time you work together.

Yes. And then the key, like you said, Lindsay, the connection key here is to remember what they tell you. When you start asking them about their preferences, the things they like, their hobbies, that's when it's really key that you care and remember so that the next time you chat, you can ask them how it's going. Exactly.

Guys, go check out 644. Are you good at spitballing in English? Go find out what that means and how to do it and all that good stuff. All right, Aubrey, you have a good rest of your day and I'll see you soon.

All right. You too. See you guys next time. Bye. Thank you for listening to Business English, a podcast just for you, the high achieving global professional.

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