BE 600: Be Social at Work This Summer Part 1: 3 Tips For Inviting Coworkers to Hang Out

This is the Business English Podcast, Episode 600, Be Social at Work This Summer, Part 1, 3 Tips for Inviting Coworkers to Hang Out. Welcome to the Business English Podcast from All Ears English. Get the English skills you need to achieve your dreams in global business. For a presentation, a meeting, or your office party, this is Real Business English with your favorite American hosts, Aubrey and Michelle, coming to you from Arizona and New York City, USA.

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Again, that's allearsenglish.com slash f-l-u-e-n-c-y-s-c-o-r-e. Hey, Michelle, how's it going? Hey, Aubrey, going well. How are you? I am great. I am excited to talk about being social at work.

This, I know a lot of our listeners want to do this, but struggle. Like it's difficult to know what to say, to be confident enough, to have the phrases. So, I mean, everyone has coworkers that they get along with well, but they haven't invited them to happy hour yet, right? Or asked them to meet for a coffee or lunch.

That's kind of a tricky hump to get past, right? To get to that. Oh yeah, definitely. Because it can be really intimidating and even to native speakers, right?

So when we do this, we're really putting ourselves out there and that can be stressful for anybody. Exactly. So today you will learn tips that make inviting coworkers out easy and stress-free as well as the freezes you need to do this. So we are excited to share this episode with you.

Definitely. Okay. I can't wait. All right, let's listen. Hey, Michelle. How are you doing? Hey, Lindsay. I'm good. How are you? Oh, my gosh. I'm good.

I'm recovering from a super fun day. Yesterday, I went hiking with some friends, and we did some winter hiking. And then we took these little sleds up with us, these little tiny sleds, and we rode them down the mountain, down the trail. Instead of actually walking down, we actually went sledding down the mountain.

That's cool. That's fun. It was so fun. Yeah, it was so fun because normally I hate the downhill. Like I hate going downhill because it's so hard on your knees.

But we can just like instead we just put the little plastic under our butts and we just went down. It was amazing. That's fun. That's cool. Yeah, it was such a good day.

There's nothing like a good day in the mountains. Oh, yeah. And I hear you're getting into all kinds of... Maybe you don't agree with me, Michelle, but... No, no, no, I would. It's just I don't spend too many days in the mountains, but I think I'm going to because, guys, I am turning into Lindsay.

I know. That's not a good idea. You are your own person, Michelle, but I heard that you're getting active in the gym now. What are you doing? What are you up to these days?

I am trying to go to the gym and taking some classes. And yeah, it's really good. Yesterday I did yoga and Pilates and I feel it in my back today and I'm excited because I want to be strong. I have no upper body strength, Lindsay.

It's terrible. You feel what in your back, like soreness or you feel like strength? I feel like strength. It's not painful, but I feel a little bit different.

I feel like I worked on it. Yeah, just slight shifts. I love that feeling. Yeah, it's so good. It's such a good workout. If I did this every day, gosh, I mean, not every day, but I wonder what it feels like to just feel completely strong.

I would be excited to know. I know, I know. That makes me excited for my Zumba class, which I'm going to go to later tonight. So all good. We're both getting in shape for springtime.

That's right. Plus, by now, it's, you know, we're in early March here now. So, you know, hey, bathing suit weather's coming soon. So get ready for it.

That's right. All right. Cool. And so, Michelle, do you normally hang out? I mean, what do you do after work? If you generally, if you're not used to going to the gym, what do you usually do?

Do you go out socially after work with friends or what do you do? Well, it depends on the weather. I mean, in the cold, it's like hard to want to do anything, right? Yeah.

But I have like some social, like some friends that I hang out with. Sometimes I do. Actually, last week I did hang out with some colleagues. So, yeah.

What about you? I guess you're like in a bit of a different situation. Yeah, because I work from home mostly. Sometimes I work from a co-working space, but...

Yeah, so I don't really have any colleagues to go out with. It's too bad. We would go out, wouldn't we? We totally would. You, me, and Jessica, we would all go out for drinks, I'm sure.

That would be fun. But we don't because we live in different parts of the country, unfortunately. We should do a Skype happy hour. Yeah, that would be fun.

After work, I like to go to the gym and things. But do you think in general it's common for Americans to do that, to go out socially with their colleagues? Yeah. really depends on the on the office i mean i feel like in like the startup world maybe um like it's like a little bit i don't know what i'm i mean i may be totally wrong like a little bit more relaxed or kind of like uh i don't know interesting atmosphere and but other other ones maybe not as much i guess it really depends on where i know i didn't answer your question at all

No, that's okay. I mean, I was just thinking about when I was in Japan, it felt so different from the norm in the United States. So when I was in Japan, we went out all the time with our students who are adults and also our coworkers, like our colleagues, our managers. And we all went out as a school together to have food and drinks and things.

And that was so normal. We did that like twice a week. That's cool. Like we would stay out until midnight. I mean, we would go out at 9 or 10 and stay out until midnight twice a week.

And that's very typical in Japan apparently. So I think that certain cultures have more interaction after work for sure than Americans do. Interesting. Yeah.

Yeah. So that's what we're talking about today, actually. We have a great question from one of our regular listeners, Eve, from Thailand. And before we go into Eve's question, I want to remind you guys, if you are taking the IELTS exam, go over and subscribe to IELTS Energy.

And also, if you want to get the transcripts for today and save 50% off what you would pay normally, go to allearsenglish.com forward slash subscribe. Okay. So, Michelle, let's dive into it. Let's see what Eve's question is and let's see if we can answer it.

all right okay here we go it's me eve from thailand it's been hi eve it's been years since i listened to your almost oh almost 700 podcast episodes oh they're they are all like i said in the past healthy and delicious oh

Yeah, that was a great quote. Yeah. Yeah, guys, we just had our 700th, right? Or is that today? No. No, actually, this is 701. Yeah. We had our 700th yesterday.

That's right. Thank you. I have also taken your listening course, and this is an eye-opening experience for me because I am able to practice my English and listen to different American stories at the same time. Wow.

It's like I travel around America myself. Thanks a bunch. Oh, Very cool. And Eve is referring to the course, our adventures course, the Connected Communicator, where we take you around the United States.

And that is currently closed, guys, but that will reopen very soon. So keep an eye out for that on our episodes here. Okay. All right. Cool. Okay. What else did Eve say?

Today, I have a question about how to successfully make an appointment with someone I know and don't know well, as well as how or what to say when that person turns me down. Okay. Ooh, yes. I've searched through your website.

I've found your episodes related to my question slash topic, 566, 395, and 386. Wow, Eve, you're awesome. And I ask you guys this question because I feel lost whenever I'm in a bid to make an appointment or a social outing that is casual with my coworkers, friends, and someone I don't know well. Thank you very much.

Warm regards, Eve from Thailand. Good question, Eve. Yeah, great question. And I love how Eve took the time and went through our website at allersenglish.com and wrote down all of the episodes that have already been done around this topic.

So just to make sure you guys know what those episodes are, 566 is how to schedule a doctor's appointment. So that's going to touch on this a little bit. And what is 395, Michelle?

395 is how to confirm plans socially. Okay. Yeah, so a little bit different from asking colleagues to go out, but it's related, okay? And what's 386? 386 is how to talk about time.

Okay, so a bunch of kind of related episodes. And we also did 493, which is how to invite someone... out in a low pressure kind of breezy way. So that's also going to be related to today, but this is going to be a little bit different.

So all these episodes can come together, guys, to help you build that connection that you want. Okay. Very cool. Oh my gosh. But when I read Eve's question and we planned today's episode, I didn't see the part about what to say when someone turned you down.

I think that'd be a really good episode for another time. Yeah, that's a great idea. Let's do it. Yeah. So, Michelle, what are we going to answer today?

Is that the end of the episode? No. Goodbye. Today, let's assume that we want to ask our colleagues out for a social drink after work. So it's not your best friends, but you'd like to get to know your colleagues better socially.

Exactly. So in this case, we wouldn't really say appointment. So I had to write back to Eve actually when Eve wrote in with this question and to get more clarification on what was meant by the word appointment. We wouldn't really say appointment because even though we're with our colleagues, it's not directly during work, right?

It's not a work appointment. It's not a work meeting. It's just an outing, okay? Right, right. Yeah. So would you agree with that, Michelle? I mean, appointment is generally used for things that are more formal or like a doctor's appointment, right?

Right. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, sure. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have a conversation with a real Texan and to try to understand their natural vocabulary and to build that confidence in that conversation?

Well, you can get started in our first lesson for free. Go to allearsenglish.com forward slash adventure to get this video lesson now. allearsenglish.com forward slash adventure.

So let's throw out some really useful phrases. And you can tell me, Michelle, if you think these are useful or not, because I always want your commentary here, you know, and let's do it. So what's our first phrase that Eve or anyone else could use at work? Let's say it's getting to be like four or five o'clock and you want to get to know your colleagues better.

What are you going to say? You could say, want to grab a drink after work? Actually, before we go into this, I want to ask you, Michelle, when you had drinks with your colleague this week, what was said? Like who invited whom and what did the person say to invite the other?

Yeah. Actually, it was just kind of a group of people in a room. And it was just like four people and two of them had already made plans and then they were talking about it. And somehow, yeah, they said, you know, you're welcome to come or something like that.

But it was it was kind of a different situation. It was already a half made plan. Okay. So two people had already made the plan and then more people were invited in.

Yes. Got it. Okay. All right. So I just thought I'd check there because we want our English to be as natural as possible here for our listeners. So, okay.

So the first one, want to grab a drink after work, right? Super casual. What do you think about using that verb to grab? Yeah, that's perfect. Very casual.

Doesn't sound like an appointment, right? Yeah, I love it. Love it. And then the next one. What's the next one, Michelle? The next one is, hey, I'm trying to get a group together for happy hour on Friday.

Feel like joining? Right. Or do you feel like joining, right? Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. So we've done some episodes on how we take off the subject and the verb sometimes, right?

Do you, we might take those off to be more casual. And, you know, hopefully by now, if you guys have been listening to this podcast, you know what that's all about. Okay. So just listen to that.

It's important to also understand it when someone says that. Feel like joining, right? Okay. Sure. Okay. Nice. How about the next one? The next one is, any interest in getting dinner after we finish up here?

Ooh, I like it. Do you like it? I love it. All right. And then the next one is, it'd be fun. It'd be. Meaning what, Michelle? It would be. It would be.

So it'd be fun to get together sometime. How about getting a group together for drinks down the street on Thursday? It's kind of wordy. But the phrase is, how about getting a group together?

Right. Or how about getting together? So how about how about doing this? I like that. Very casual. Yeah. It's kind of indirect. It's instead of saying like, would you like to?

Right. It's kind of like, how about doing this? Right. How about this? Right. Right. Right. Exactly. And I opened up that phrase with something interesting.

I said, it'd be fun to get together sometime. Now, Michelle, when an American person says sometime, sometime. Yeah. Well, I mean, it might mean never, right?

But because it's followed up with a real invitation, with a clear time and place, it's real. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's funny. It makes me think. So we did an episode a long time ago, way back in the very beginning of the All Ears English podcast.

And that episode was called, Is the Invitation Real? Where we did some role plays. And that was episode 92 to help you guys try to figure out when it's real and when it's not. And I have a friend who...

basically grew up in this country, but I think came here when she was 10 or something or 13. And I think there's still maybe some small cultural things that she might miss sometimes.

And she was explaining how someone, a friend of hers who works somewhere had asked her to come by and visit sometime. Right. And so she showed up at the place where he works to visit and he acted totally weird. Yeah.

Oh my gosh. And I heard her like, you know, explaining this, like it was completely, no, he told me to show up, you know, until I showed up. And then our other friend was like, why'd you show up?

Oh my gosh. And she was saying, well, he was working. And, and I don't know, I was thinking to myself, maybe something cultural is going on here. Yeah.

Yeah. Could be. Yeah. Very interesting. So Something we should keep in mind, right, guys? I mean, it's tricky. You just, you know, if some time is followed up by a real invitation, then like with a time and a date, then yes, it's real.

But if it's vague, then you want to be careful. Okay? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So, Michelle, should we use these expressions and do a little role play?

Let's do it. All right. Let's do it. So, I'll be A. So, here we go. So, hey, how did your meeting with the VP go? Oh, it went well. They are offering me some new projects, and I'm happy about that.

Cool. Well, hey, I'm trying to get a group together for happy hour on Friday. Do you feel like joining? Oh, I wish I could. I have this meditation class I'm taking on Fridays after work, but I'm free tonight.

Any interest in getting dinner after we finish up here? Oh, yeah. Actually, that sounds great. You can let me know what new projects you're doing. Sure.

Sounds good. I also want to hear more about this meditation class. I could use that too. Okay, sounds good. It's a plan. Oh, Michelle, meditation class on Friday evenings?

Wow, you are changing. That's right. You're becoming someone else. That's right. Oh, yeah. Yeah, very cool. Okay, I thought this was pretty realistic.

What did you think, Michelle, here? Yeah, for sure. I thought very friendly, very casual relationship. Yeah, so what did we use here in this case? What phrases did we use?

Well, first you said, hey, I'm trying to get a group together for happy hour on Friday. And then you said, I think you said, do you feel like joining, right? But you could have said feel like joining. Right.

For that time, for whatever reason, I just decided to include do you, but it's pretty optional, especially when you're in such a casual conversation situation, guys. Okay. Yeah.

Obviously, when we're writing something, well, I suppose if we're writing a text or an email, then we could do that, too. We could say feel like joining. But if we're writing like a paper report, something formal, then you're going to include do you. OK, I think our listeners get that.

Yeah, yeah. And then what did what did I say? You said any interest in getting dinner after we finish up here? Right. So, yeah. So, you know, I invited you out and then that's, that's a good way to respond when someone says, no, you, you know, we have a counter invite, right?

Counter invitation. That's right. Right. Exactly. Exactly. I like it. So here we just chose a couple of the phrases, guys, because we can't, we can't use all of them in one conversation.

Yeah. But we forgot, Michelle, to talk about what to say when someone says no. And we can actually cover that in a different episode for Eve and for our other listeners here. Yeah, I think that would be good.

Let's do that. Okay, sounds good. So, guys, remember, grab the transcripts and save 50% by subscribing at allearsenglish.com forward slash subscribe. And this has been good, Michelle.

So, cool. Well, thanks for hanging out. And I hope this episode was helpful for our listeners today. All right, awesome. Have a good one, guys. And thanks, Eve, for the question.

Yeah, take care. Bye. Bye. Michelle, these are such great phrases. Though our examples in the episode were for asking someone out for a drink, these can be adjusted for any scenario, right?

Coffee, lunch, you can use these same phrases if you're inviting someone to do anything. Right. Yeah, exactly. And I especially love getting a group together and then inviting someone new that I'd like to get to know better.

Right. So I might say something like, hey, I'm trying to get a group together for happy hour on Friday. Feel like joining or do you feel like joining? Yes, exactly.

Because this way, there's no pressure on either of you and no hard feelings. If they can't make it, right, you are eliminating any chance of awkwardness. And also you're letting them know, it's not just me and you, there's a bunch of people here. So that's so much easier.

And they could leave early if they need, right? It's just so much less pressure. Yeah, definitely, guys. So really go ahead and use these phrases to be social this summer and build those connections at work.

Absolutely. Awesome. Thanks for joining me, Michelle. I'm excited for all of our listeners to use these phrases to connect at work this summer. Awesome.

All right. See you soon. Bye. Bye. Thank you for listening to Business English, a podcast just for you, the high achieving global professional. Want more from All Ears English?

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