AEE: I Walked Right Past It: Connection in Life's Messy Moments

This is an All Ears English podcast. I walked right past it. Connection in life's messy moments. welcome to the all ears english podcast downloaded more than 200 million times are you feeling stuck with your english we'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection not perfection with your american hosts lindsey mcmahon the english adventurer and michelle kaplan the new york radio girl

coming to you from Colorado and New York City, USA. And to get your transcripts delivered by email every week, go to allearsenglish.com forward slash subscribe.

Do you tend to lose things even when those items like your sunglasses or your wallet are right in front of you? If so, you're not alone. Today, find out what to say when you make this mistake because life is full of these silly moments.

Are you still translating from your native language into English in your head? Are you always getting confused between the different grammar tenses? Let's figure out what you need to work on. Find your current English level with our five-minute quiz at allearsenglish.com slash fluency score.

Hey there, Michelle. What's shaking? What's going on? Hey, Lindsay, not too much. Lindsay, have you ever been on the phone and looked for it while you were on it?

Oh, yeah, of course. Yes, of course. Or Michelle, have you ever looked for your sunglasses and not realized they were on your head? Yes. Yes, of course.

Um, yeah. So I, I have, I think we spoke about this recently, but this is a very, I think this is pretty common. I think everybody can relate to this kind of moment where you're like, Oh my God.

Um, yeah. Like the face plant moment, right. Where we, yeah, yeah, exactly. You're looking for something and then it's in a super obvious place or in the fridge.

Do you ever ask, like I'll say to Dan, like, where is the Greek yogurt? And it's like, it's right There. It's right there. Oh, no, no, for sure. I'm not very good at looking for things and finding things.

They're usually right in front of my face. Right. Exactly. Exactly. So this is a I think this is a universal situation that people find themselves in.

So we're going to talk about how to describe this situation in English because. this is great for storytelling, for teasing yourself. So it's one of those things that seems like such a, like a kind of a silly topic, but can actually bring about connection. And it's, and it's fun.

Like it's lighthearted and it's fun. Yeah. And this could be, these phrases could be useful. Even let's say in the work break room, if you're looking for something that you left there, your coffee cup, right?

Your special coffee cup. And it's right there. Or at home or at a friend's house. So it's going to be really useful all over the place. Okay. Yes, exactly.

So, all right, guys, before we get into it, we want to remind you to hit the follow button wherever you're listening to All Ears English so you don't miss anything. Yes. Hit follow now, guys, if you believe in our philosophy, which is connection, not perfection. All right.

All right. So we've already given some hints to our listeners of what we might say. I think we both said earlier, it was right in front of my face, right? Yes.

Yeah, so I love this one. I mean, it was right in front. It doesn't have to have been right in front. It doesn't have to be literal. But it's just saying it was so close to me.

It was in such an obvious spot. So I was looking everywhere for my wallet, and then it was right in front of my face. I wonder why the human brain does this. I wonder if it's because there's just a lot of other chaos going on and we just don't identify the item as the thing we're looking for because our eyes pass over it.

Yeah. Right? Sometimes I feel like, oh, whatever I'm looking, I like personify it. Like I feel like whatever I'm looking for, it exists somewhere and it's kind of laughing at me.

that's funny it knows i'm looking for it and it's laughing at me it's somewhere it is somewhere right is yeah lindsey is there something in your life that you feel like you always misplace like or you just it's just like unfortunately it's not any one thing it's all things it's all things it's

I do this. Like my partner teases me a lot that this is like, I'm the worst. The idea is that I look like a child would look for something. Like I don't, I don't do a good job really looking for things and finding them.

Yeah. Unfortunately. Yeah. Like for me, I feel like I'm always looking for a nail clipper. Oh, yes. Always, always. Like last night I was desperate. Like my nails are getting long and I like to keep them short.

And I was like, do you have a designated spot where the nail clipper goes? Apparently I don't. Right. That's that's the issue. If I had it, I just like need to leave one in every room so that I can lose each of them one by one.

But I have a lot. um yeah so i feel like i'm you know and then you buy a new one and then you find the old one and then you lose the new one and then so it's just you have like 10 nail clippers which you yeah but then they're all gone also so like i feel like it's a nail clipper um i'm like and there are there are things that i will not buy an expensive one of them because i lose that like sunglasses i will not buy expensive sunglasses expensive glasses gloves, anything like that, because it's like throwing it in the trash. I know.

I go through phases with sunglasses. I'll go and splurge on a nice pair. And then my last nice pair, I left them in the bathroom of a brewery. I was so mad.

I just loved it. And then I went back and they were gone. How sad, right? Oh, that is sad. So someone else thought they were nice too. Yeah, I guess so.

Anyways, let's get back to the phrases. So what's the next one, Michelle? I was looking right at it. So again, you weren't, I mean, maybe you were just like,

staring in a cabinet looking for something, but it's more metaphorical. Like it was just it was right there. So where's my credit card? Oh, gosh, I was looking right at it.

Yes, exactly. And you might say this, even if you are at the grocery store, and you're digging into your wallet to try to pay for your groceries, you might say this out loud. And And you might have a little chuckle with the cashier, right?

Yeah. Have you ever given in like a subway card or something or your insurance card to the... All the time. I'm like, do you take... And then usually if it's like at a bar or something, the bartender will make a snide remark or something and tease you a little bit, you know. You're supposed to pay the bill and you give them your ID or vice versa.

Yeah. Oh, God. So embarrassing. Yeah. Or you can just comment on it. You can say the one place I didn't think to look. So you could say, I went to the post and I went to the lost and found.

Oh yeah. What am I doing? Okay. I went to the lost and found. I looked all over the place and then guess what? It was on my dashboard. The one place I didn't think to look.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, gosh. It's like you looked everywhere except that one spot. It's just what we call a brain fart, right? It's a brain fart. Yeah.

Or sometimes, you know, I remember I was looking for a very important document with my dad. We had it. We had it. And then we drove somewhere and then we both couldn't find it.

Oh, it hadn't left the car like we didn't do anything we were both starting to freak out and then it was it had like fallen like behind it like in the glove compartment it had like fallen in the crack behind it oh gosh oh gosh yeah don't even get me started with with my dad he loses stuff all the time it's bad news i mean

Oh, poor guy. I wanted to buy him like a way to connect his phone to his belt or something. So we're not losing the phone so much, but what can you do? Life is hard.

Life is hard. Yeah. All right, Michelle, there's a few other things we could say. It was staring me in the face. So this is kind of the persona personification one, you know, so the other one was it was right in front of my face.

But this one makes it sound like it has eyes and it's looking at you and yeah, personification. I love it. You can say so I finally found my book. It was staring me in the face right on my desk.

Yes. Or I walked right past it. So I totally missed my bag. I walked right past it. Yeah. Yeah. And I think I love this episode because I think it's going to be universally relatable for our listeners.

Yeah. Yeah. Right. They're all probably doing some version of this at some point in their lives, right? On a regular basis. So I hope, I hope it's not just us.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't think so. But yeah, it just, I mean, Lindsay, why is this a good connection topic? Just because, you know, it happens to you. And in that moment, there's someone around you, a spouse, a friend, a cashier who it also happens to sometimes.

Yeah. And when they can see themselves in you, you have connection. If you can articulate, instead of getting nervous and getting awkward, we just articulate, we use one of these phrases and we kind of make fun of ourselves a little bit. Yeah.

And also for storytelling, you know, you're telling someone, you know, sometimes it's just a funny story. I mean, I think I told you the story of when I couldn't find my glasses and what I picked up instead.

I don't think so, actually. I'll tell it real fast. So this was years ago when I first moved to New York and I've since gotten laser eye surgery, so I don't wear glasses, but I had pretty bad vision and And I was the worst thing would be if you took out your contact lenses without knowing where your glasses were.

Because then you're like, I had done that. And so I was looking and I'm like feeling everywhere on my bed. Where where are they? And then I found them and I picked it up and it was a granola bar.

And that's how bad my vision was that I saw the granola bar and I'm like, there are my glasses. Yes. I thought those were my glasses. So that's how bad my vision used to be.

So I just picked it up. I'm like, this is a granola. Oh my gosh. I'm glad you got the surgery. Jeez, Michelle. exactly yes yes i definitely was so anyway so in this role play we're not going to use all of these but in this role play i couldn't find my glasses and you are with me yeah of course someone's always around to witness this yes yes right exactly all right here here we go oh where are they are these them

Oh, yes. Thank you. Wow. They were right in front of my face. That stuff happens to me all the time. Once I couldn't find my luggage at the airport. I was in a total panic.

I asked someone and guess what? I was looking right at it. Yeah. I think this is more likely to happen if we're like high strong or we're feeling nervous or something.

Yeah. At least for me, it does. An airport would be a place because I do a lot of checking. I'm kind of a checker. We've talked about this before. So I'll get out of the lift and I'll be dropped off at the airport and then I'll be like checking.

Okay, do I have my phone? Do I have this? And that would be the moment when it'd be like, where's my phone? Where's my phone? Even though my hand is on my phone in my pocket.

And then you go into a little panic. Didn't you say you just had this happen to you where you were like, where's my phone? Like, did I say that? I don't know.

At the airport. Yes. Was it in the bathroom or? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're talking about. Okay. Yeah, that happened. That did happen. Yep. I thought I had left it in the bathroom at the airport.

And so I sprinted like across two terminals. My heart was exploding, but it was actually in my pocket. It was just in a different pocket. Oh my God. See, that's exactly for this situation.

So this is a moment that can connect people for sure. It's just like these moments. Wait, that was recently, right? That was like two years ago. Oh, two years ago.

Oh, okay. Okay. A little while. Um, but that was like a stress. I also think maybe it correlates with when there's a lot going on in our lives and there's just a lot on our minds, right?

Yeah. Yeah. Our minds are busy. So anyways, um, let's go through this. Yeah. Yeah. So I said, oh, where are they? And you said, are these them? And I said, yes, thank you.

Wow. They were right in front of my face. So I'm just kind of making a commentary of why didn't I see them? Yeah, exactly. And then again, I'm empathizing with you.

I'm saying it happens to me all the time. I thought I lost my luggage at the airport and I was in a panic situation. And then, you know, I asked someone and guess what? I was looking right at it.

Like my, my luggage was right there. And I went and asked someone, have you seen my luggage? Right. Those are always the most embarrassing moments. Right.

So, um, guys, if you haven't listened to this already, check out episode 26, 16. That's it's called that's on me admitting mistakes without making it awkward.

Yeah. And the truth is, I mean, to leave you guys with a final thought here, you know, this is the messiness of life. This is kind of what makes life crazy and stressful, but also good. And we see this in our partners, our friends are doing the same things, making these silly mistakes.

So now you have the language to comment on it, right? Yep. I mean, instead of saying nothing or saying a textbook phrase, this is not the time for textbook phrases in English. No.

Right. Not at all. Not at all. So, but this, this is fun. It's a huge connection moment. You can share funny stories about things that can have happened in the past.

You can even comment to yourself about something that's happening. Oh, it was right in front of my face. But everybody can relate to this. I mean, this is certainly universal.

We hope so. We hope we're not the only ones. Yeah, yeah, exactly. People are like, wait, what? Maybe we'll get fan mail and our listeners will say, what are you talking about?

I've never done that before. I've never had that happen. Yeah. All right. Good stuff today, Michelle. I'll see you back here on the show soon. You have a good day.

All right. Bye, Lindsay. Bye. Thanks for listening to All Ears English. Would you like to know your English level? Take our two minute quiz. Go to allearsenglish.com forward slash fluency score.

And if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.